‘What great big ears you have, Grandma.’ ‘All the better to hear you with,’ the Wolf replied. ‘What great big eyes you have, Grandma,’ said Little Red Riding Hood.
‘All the better to see you with,’ the Wolf replied.
He sat there watching her and smiled. He thought, I’m going to eat this child. Compared with her old Grandmamma She’s going to taste like caviar.
Then Little Red Riding Hood said, ‘But Grandma, what a lovely great big furry coat you have on.’
‘That’s wrong!’ cried Wolf. ‘Have you forgot ‘To tell me what BIG TEETH I’ve got? ‘Ah well, no matter what you say, ‘I’m going to eat you anyway.’
The small girl smiles. One eyelid fl ickers. She whips a pistol from her knickers. She aims it at the creature’s head
And bang bang bang, she shoots him dead.
A few weeks later, in the wood, I came across Miss Riding Hood. But what a change! No cloak of red, No silly hood upon her head.
She said, ‘Hello and do please note ‘My lovely furry WOLFSKIN COAT.’
