gations. In these cases, a strong religious community can provide a level of support similar to that provided by kin in the homeland. Again, at the earliest opportunity these mothers will travel to their homeland for special family ministering and support. These families will respond to the offer of bereavement home visits and will attend a support group. Grief and loss is viewed as part of life experience.
African American. Among African American families, the elders are very important and revered. The elders pass along practices surrounding birth, death, and child rearing.
Some families experience racism, however, and may have had a bad experience with the traditional support system.
One middle class African American mother was not able to go to the hospital when her baby died. The police had detained her husband who was caring for the infant when she died. The mother had to seek legal support for his release. This mother said “she had her grief for the infant on hold” to help her husband. When the situation was over, arrangements were made for the baby’s burial. Both parents believed their baby was safe because she was buried next to their great grandparents. This was a comfort to them. This family accepted the full range of bereavement program services. They attended the support group and presented their story at conferences. They also provide peer support to other families. This is all done in memory of their daughter, Ayesha.
Researchers (Van & Meleis, 2010, 2003; Van, 2001) report African American mothers expe- rience a variety of responses following the death of their baby. One underlying sentiment is resignation that “it happened for a reason.” Mothers frequently rationalize many “black teens are dying and maybe it is better that their babies died young.” “He is too good for this world” is commonly heard. Van reported that mothers with a significant other and those who had deeper spirituality were able to come to terms with the death more quickly than mothers who were isolated and without spiritual/church connection. Many of these mothers had reassuring dreams that their infant was in a better place. The baby was viewed as the mother’s protector and intercessor in heaven. It is important to always offer a full range of bereavement services because of these variations in responses. However, the mothers who had a wide network of extended families usually relied on family support and only accepted bereavement literature and phone calls from the SIDS program.
VOICES FROM THE COMMUNITY: CROSS CULTURAL EXPRESSIONS OF GRIEF AT THE LOSS OF AN INFANT
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