Thursday, 21st
December 2017
info@eastcorkjournal.ie
35
Come Diet With Me
down on myself. Suffice to say I’m most
certainly reaping the ben- efits of my lifestyle change. And that 3lb loss last
by JOANNE DELANEY
ONE...TWO... THREE!! Another week another
success... It might sound a bit strange, but it seems like I’m constantly happy with everything – which is new to me given that I have always been very
week speaks for itself ! I cannot believe
I’m
saying this but I am not only 5lb off a two stone loss in only 6 weeks!! Now that’s results! I still don’t feel like it’s
a diet, I don’t feel in any way deprived and I’m no longer craving sugar or looking for crisps any-
more and everything feels better! Skin hair nails the works.
I’m really hoping to
hit my 2 stone loss before Christmas, it would be a nice little bonus. I won’t lie, I’m dread- ing Christmas day and the amount of temptation all over the Christmas table, and if there’s one thing my father in law likes to do is feed people.. But if I do slip and chances are I will, I’ll just jump right back on
Lose weight and feel great this party season.
It’s not just what you eat, it’s why. Through private, individual consultations, we will help you to change your habits and behaviour so you can reach and maintain your desired weight, long-term.
Lose
a Stone for Christmas
Tristan lost 7st Clare lost 4st Ita lost 3st 5lbs Noleen lost 2st
the horse and keep riding.. I’m only human after all! But as a very wise woman called Aisling told me – Little Pickers wear bigger knickers… I think that quote will stay with me for life. I
also cannot believe
how many people are no- ticing the loss, a lot are saying things like, you look great, or your skin is so clear, or gosh you’ve changed your hair, when I haven’t, I think people
know something is differ- ent about me but can’t exactly pinpoint it. And when I say yeah, I’ve lost some weight, they’re like ‘Ohh, that’s what it is.’ I can’t believe 2018 is
almost upon us, but to be honest I’ll not be sorry to see 2017 go, all it seem to do is bring misery and sor- row for me personally. I would however like to
take this opportunity to thank the team at Motiva- tion Weight Management for the support and en- couragement over the last 6 weeks. I cannot wait to see what you guys can do
for me in 2018! To all of Come Diet
with me followers on both Facebook and twitter, I would like to thank you all for your continued emails texts and letters of support, you genuinely have no idea how much it means to me. Now you’ll not
from me over the next three weeks as the next paper isn’t January 11th
the hype will be over, San- ta will have been and gone to the millions of little girls and boys, and fami- lies come together. Christmas this year will
hear
printed until , however I
will keep my twitter and Facebook feeds updated with my journey. Only four more days until Christmas, and all
Call 021 2428911 Little Island
308 Harbour Point Business Park, Courtstown, Little Island
Call 1800-22-44-88 Grand Parade
58-60 The Medical Centre, McHugh House, Cork City, Cork
www.motivation.ie Coping With Loss At Christmas by SALLY O’REILLY “It’s like being mugged”
a client once said to me. What a word. Mugged. She was talking about that way the grief sneaks up on you. You might be laughing with a friend, or at the TV and suddenly you find yourself weeping
uncontrollably,
missing your loved one so much that it physically hurts. It’s like an assault. Christmas has a way of
jerking those tears out of us. It’s a time where the pressure to be happy is re- ally on - HO HO HO! The ads are yelling at us to ‘buy, buy, BUY!’, films are show- ing us shiny happy families with reunion filled endings and all that music... jeep-
ers. It’s a cheer fest, that’s for sure. One that would make the calmest people want to gouge their own eyes out if they are also try- ing to cope with feeling of loss and loneliness. Feelings that are seemingly at odds with how we are ‘supposed’ to feel during the Holidays.
Here’s the thing though: Grief doesn’t take time off.
A person I care very
deeply about recently suf- fered a significant loss. Apart from trying to save her own sense of sanity, she is also struggling with how to bring her kids through Christmas. Apart from the trauma that can come with loss (through death or sep- aration) there are also the practical issues to contend with at a time where San- ta is on his way. Gifts need buying (with probably less money than before), visitors need welcoming,
relatives @eastcorkjournal / #eastcorkjournal
need caring - the list, as you well know, is as long as you make it. As you make it. There’s the thing - we
make our own traditions, and when we are suffering , tired and lonely we are in no position to function at our previous normal levels. This year, if you’ve had a loss, it’s going to be differ- ent. It just is. And next year will be too. Eventually, you might be comfortable with the new different, but not yet.
And so please 1: Give yourself space
to grieve, to cry, to shout, to hit something - even a pillow. Get in your car and roar at the injustice of it all. You are allowed to be an- gry, to be devastated, to feel vulnerable. Because
you
are human. These feelings are a part of you, they are not you. And they will not break you, even though you feel broken. 2: Talk to someone. A
eastcorkjournal
friend, a therapist, a help- line. You deserve support and need not prove your strength by managing this alone. None of us are built for that. None of us. You are surviving - there’s your strength right there. 3: Ask your kids if they
need to talk to someone other than you. They might be glad of it. They might have private thoughts and grief of their own that they don’t want to share with you. That’s normal and healthy - simply giv- ing them permission
to
have those feelings will be a wonderful gift for them. They too need to know that feeling awful, despite Santa’s impending arrival, is normal. 4: Reassure
your that kids their grief is not a
burden to you. And, (you probably know where I’m headed with this) remind yourself that your grief is not a burden to those who care about you. If you are the “listener” usually, try
a new “talker” sweater on for size and see how it fits. You’re not used to wear- ing it, I know. But it’s bet- ter than suffering the cold. And Christmas sure can be cold!
5: Set aside a time to
remember. Grief, be it a death or a separation, de- serves attention. Plan a time when you sit with your memories, and allow your brain to do its thing - it will flit from good to bad, painful to funny and you might cry. Because you are in pain, and that’s just what we do.
6: Make a new ritual.
Christmas is all about ritu- al and tradition. These are things we create - habits. And that means we can make new ones. Your life may have changed forever because of this loss, and so it’s OK to make a new tra- dition. It might be visiting a grave, or a favourite place, and eating a favourite meal (not everyone likes tur- key!!). You get to decide.
be especially hard for my Family given we have lost two of the most amazing people in the world, and without them it just won’t be the same- but we’ll do our best
to make them
proud! Wishing you all a very
Happy Christmas, and a Happy, Healthy and pros- perous 2018! Until Next Year X
7: Make a memory box.
This can be a great thing to do with kids at this time of year. Each of them can add something that holds sig- nificance for them - be it a piece of a toy, or clothing, a photo or a ticket stub. This box can be something each of you can go to to feel close to the missing person if that’s what you need. It can be tiny or huge. Again, it doesn’t matter, it’s the meaning attached to it and the doing together that will make it special. 8: Write your person a
card or a letter. Depend- ing on your kids age, they might want to do the same. It’s just for you. Writing is a time honoured addition to good therapy. And we often find that once we start writing we come out with things that we would never have said to our- selves, let alone to another person. And with that can come comfort and clarity. You might then decide to burn it, read it to a friend or a therapist, or keep it in a memory box. It’s your choice. There is no right
or wrong way to do any of this.
9: Don’t feel guilty if you
find yourself having fun in the middle of all the pain. You are not doing anything wrong, and your missing person, if they cared about you, would want you to be able to feel joy. 10: Avoid the temptation
to medicate it all away. It’s a short term solution that you already know won’t really help. Take care of yourself, and know that this, like everything else we face, will pass. My warmest Christmas
wishes to you all and see you in 2018! Sally O’Reilly is a Psy-
chologist, Psychotherapist & Clinical Supervisor in private
practice in East
Cork with twenty years’ full time experience. She has a special interest in working with teenagers and writes for
Voiceboks.com, Fami-
lyFriendlyHQ.com as well as her own blog sallyoreilly. com. For more info contact her through her site, on 0872338804 or on Twitter @psychosal.
Tel: 021 463 8000 • Email:
info@eastcorkjournal.ie • Web:
www.eastcorkjournal.ie
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