candis debate
your children under lock and key just because of what you read about in the papers. I think some parents smother their children just because they’re afraid to let them out.” Susan: “I also think parenting has changed because women’s roles have altered significantly, with more juggling motherhood and a career. Mums who spend a lot of time away from their child can sometimes feel guilty and that leads to them being overprotective when they are with them. But the same can happen if they spend too much time with their baby. In past generations, people often lived close to their parents, so would happily leave their child with them. That’s not always the case now so a lot of mums don’t get used to being away from their child, so again that can lead to an overprotective attitude.” Are there situations when children need overprotection? Susan: “I’ve just been through this with my 15-year-old daughter,
is their biggest fear, while 34% worry about road danger*
‘stranger danger’
of parents say
54%
because recently she needed to get a taxi for the first time on her own. I explained to her in finite detail exactly what she needed to do and why she needed to do it, because it’s not the sort of thing I wanted her making a judgement call on. So absolutely, there are certain situations where parents must be very protective, but we also have to remember that we can’t be with our children every step of the way, so we have to carefully try and give them as much guidance as possible and equip them with the knowledge that will help keep them safe.” Sharon: “Yes and it’s the same with the internet – no parent in their right mind would allow their
younger children to go online without closely
monitoring what they’re doing and the websites they are viewing, but as they get older they will use the internet independently when you’re not there so they need to be made aware of the dangers. I wouldn’t say that’s being an overprotective
74 OCTOBER 2011 |
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parent though, I think it’s more about being vigilant.” Does the Government bombard parents with too many guidelines to follow? Susan: “I think over the years there’s been far too much State intervention into parenting. The Government is constantly telling us what we should be feeding our kids and the number of hours they should be allowed to watch TV, and I don’t think that’s right. How can we teach our children about decision making if we can’t even think for ourselves?” Pam: “I agree – I think some of the Government guidelines are making parents paranoid. There are too many rules to follow and if you go against their advice you can end up feeling like a terrible mother. But to an extent I can understand why they’re doing it on health grounds as some children have an awful diet, so obesity has increased, which will cost the NHS millions of pounds in the long run. I just wish there weren’t quite so many guidelines in place because it can make you feel like we live in a ‘nanny state’.” Sharon: “But I see their guidelines as an attempt to help us to keep our children safe rather than telling us
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