“I don’t want my pupils to make the same mistakes I did”
Pam Redican, 58, lives in Leeds with her husband Phil, 59. She is the mother of two daughters, Rachel, 38, and Becky, 23
S
chool was a place I loved as a young girl because it was the only place I felt safe. I was taken into care
as a baby after suffering severe neglect, then over the next 16 years experienced serious physical and sexual abuse in foster care and children’s homes. The classroom was my
sanctuary and, as I got older, I dreamt of opening my own school where children like me could also live if they wanted to. Having survived such cruelty, I truly believed I could help children experiencing difficulties in their life. So I decided the first step was to become a teacher. I did three years of training while a single mum to my daughter Rachel, now 38, who I had at 19. My first job was as a PE and science teacher in a large girls’ school in London, then at 28 I moved to a special school for boys with emotional and behavioural difficulties. Every day I was gaining the experience I needed to open my own school. But the focus I needed to make
my dream a reality started slipping away as over the years I gradually became dependant on alcohol. It released the knot
I felt in my stomach that had formed as a result of my awful childhood experiences. In 1986 I married my second husband, Phil, and a year later we had Becky, now 23. Phil didn’t realise the extent of my drinking. I was extremely secretive, topping up soft drinks with vodka hidden in my bag. My life was a contrast. In my
career I gained promotions and worked with children who had behavioural difficulties. I helped a lot of troubled kids turn their life around as both a mentor and teacher. But I couldn’t get my own life under control. By 1998, I was downing a bottle and a half of vodka, topped up with wine and strong lager, every night. But despite how awful I felt in the morning, I always went to work. I adored my pupils and wanted them to know they could depend on me. The turning point came in December 1998. A friend died and I was distraught. Drink was ruining my life and I felt like giving up – my marriage was under strain and I couldn’t do all the hard work needed to open my own school. But the thought of leaving Phil and my girls, plus
58 OCTOBER 2011 |
WWW.CANDIS.CO.UK
all my pupils, scared me into finally getting help. It was incredibly hard to stop drinking, but planning for my own school gave me focus. I drew up a business plan and approached potential investors. My dream was to create a centre of excellence where kids aged ten to 18 with behavioural and emotional difficulties could live. It took a lot of hard work, but thinking of all the children who could benefit from it made me determined, even when we had to use our house as collateral. In March 2003, the first Wings
School opened in Cumbria with 12 children. There are now 59 pupils, and 18 months ago we opened another in Nottingham. As well as offering mainstream
education, we help children learn about themselves. I know just how easy it is to fall into destructive habits if you hide your feelings, so I want to minimise that risk for our pupils. If they can learn from my awful mistakes, then all the terrible things I’ve been through will have been worth it.
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