Women Rule The World.


No man has ever done anything that a woman hasn’t either allowed him to do, or encouraged him to do. Bob Dylan


Whalley Road


Great Harwood 01254 882888 07870 485430


07 A6 2.0 TDi S line multitronic 4dr met blue 45k FSH £15,991 57 BMW 318i 4 Dr Met Gold 60k FSH


04 BMW Z4 3.0i 2dr met silver 59k convertible A/C


£14,991 £11,991


56 Xsara Picasso 2.0i 16v Exclusive 5dr met silver FSH £5,691 07 Fiesta 1.25 Zetec 5dr met silver 42k hatchback 06 Mercedes SL 350 Tip 2Dr Convertible Met Black 56 Focus 1.8 TDCi 5dr met black 59k diesel FSH 09 Ka 1.2 Style+ 3dr red 8k FSH A/C CD


£5,991


£28,491 £6,991 £7,491


54 Honda CR - V 2.0i - V TEC Sport Estate 5dr met blue £7,991 05 Jaguar S - Type 2.7d V6 SE 4dr met green diesel 55 Jaguar X-Type 2.2d SE 5dr met blue Estate FSH 03 Mini One 1.4d 3dr Met Silver 60k FSH Diesel 56 Seat Alhambra Stylance TDi Grey 53 Rover 45 2ltr TD ie 5Dr Met Blue FSH


07 Saab 9-3 1.9 TID Linear sport anniversary FSH 52 VW Golf 2 ltr GTi 3Dr Met Blue FSH 63k


08 Volvo C30 D5 SE Geartronic 3 Dr Coupe Met Blue Many More Vehicles In Stock


£11,991 www.martholmemotorcompany.co.uk


We have been sent a photograph of a Blonde Pole Dancer. We would not normally print this kind of material as some people seem to be easily offended and report us to all sorts of


authorities. But in this case, and after some serious discussions amongst our staff we feel we should take a risk and print the photograph. See overleaf.


£8,991 £8,691 £6,491


£10,491 £2,991 £9,491 £3,991


Three mischievous old Grannies were sitting on a bench outside a nursing home when an old Granddad walked by. One of the old Grandmas shouted out, "I bet we can tell exactly how old you are." The old man said, "There’s is no way you can


guess my age.” One of the old Grandmas said, "Sure we can! Just drop your pants and under shorts and we’ll tell you your exact age." Embarrassed just a little, but anxious to prove they couldn't do it, he dropped his drawers. The Grandmas asked him to first turn around a couple of times and to jump up and down several times. Then they all said in unison, "You're 87 years old!" Standing with his pants down around his ankles, the old gent asked in amazement,


"How in the world did you guess?"


Slapping their knees and grinning from ear to ear, the three old ladies happily admitted... "We were at your birthday party yesterday!"


If You Can’t Say Anything Nice ! I’ve seen healthier looking faces on a Pirate’s Flag. He looks as if his face was designed in a wind tunnel.


He has a very sympathetic face, it has everyone’s sympathy.


He’s so ugly that when he went for a vasectomy the doctor said “With a face like that you don’t need one.”


To look at his face you’d think his hobby was stepping on rakes.


She had a mud pack and looked great for two days, then the mud fell off.


Now that’s a shopping bag !


5.


1 . R o n n i e Wo o d


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