My Mum hates housework, She makes the beds, does the
dishes, then six months later she has to do it all over again. How daft is that ?
No one believes seniors . everyone thinks they are senile. An elderly couple was celebrating their sixtieth anniversary. The couple had married as childhood sweethearts and had moved back to their old neighbourhood after they retired. Holding hands, they walked back to their old school. It was not locked, so they entered, and found the old desk they’d shared, where Andy had carved “I love you, Sally.” On their way back home, a bag of money fell out of an armoured car, practically landing at their feet. Sally quickly picked it up and, not sure what to do with it, they took it home. There, she counted the money-fifty thousand pounds! Andy said, “We’ve got to give it back.” Sally said, “Finders keepers.” She put the money back in the bag and hid it in their attic. The next day, two police officers were canvassing the area, looking for the money, and knocked on their door. “Pardon me, did either of you find a bag that fell out of an armoured car yesterday?” Sally said, “No”. Andy said, “She’s lying. She hid it up in the attic. Sally said, “Don’t believe him, he’s getting senile.” The agents turned to Andy and began to question him. One said: “Tell us the story from the beginning.” Andy said, “Well, when Sally and I were walking home from school yesterday ....” The first police officer turned to his partner and said, “We’re outta here!”
There is more money being spent on breast implants and Viagra today than on Alzheimer's research. This means that by 2040, there should be a large elderly population with all the tools and absolutely no recollection of what to do with them.
A house only needs to be cleaned once every girlfriend !
Music Quiz ( All the answers are sneakily hidden in the adverts ) 1. Which guitarist moved from The Faces to The Rolling Stones? 2. Who was “Walking back to happiness” in 1961? 3.Who was “The man with the golden trumpet” during the 50’s? 4. In which City was “The house of the rising sun?” 5. What single had 9 weeks at number 1 in 1975 ? 6. Duran Duran took their name from a character in which film? 7. “Eye Level” was the theme to which 70’s TV Series ? 8. “Song For Whoever” was the first chart entry for who ? 9. Who wrote “Chain Reaction” for Diana Ross ? 10. Who is Known as “ The Boss”?
On Dance. Dancing with her was like moving a Piano.
The trouble with nude dancing is that not everything stops when the music does.
Start with your left foot…….Which one ? Dancing is a perpendicular expression of a horizontal desire.
It’s a fact that no single man has ever vacuumed behind a settee !
If your children insist on writing their names in the dust on your furniture, don’t let them write the year.
Hello, It is that time of the year again. I need a small favour .... I wouldn't ask this if you were not such a good friend, but I am going away on holiday and I need a friend to drop by to water my plants while I am gone. The plants are mostly geraniums and begonias. If it's not too much trouble. In the hot weather they'll probably need watering twice a day. I'll only be away for a week. I've attached a photo for your reference. ( See Overleaf.) I'll send you a post card! Thanks so much.
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