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SUNDAY, DECEMBER 26, 2010 When will Oprah save us? In her OWN time. oprah from E1


digital archive disaster, is the Christmastime story of the birth ofOWN. With new reality-based shows


about clutter, sex, relationships, families, miracles, spiritual bal- ance, healthy cooking and a daily dose of Oprah BFF Gayle King’s talk show,we shall see the fullest, epistolary template for what Oprah desiredmost for her devot- edminions.


Watching OWN’s shows, I no-


ticed that they all in one way or another carry a classy Oprah- worthy imprimatur, in which val- ue isplacedontruthandlearning. Nowhere is that more evident


thanon“OprahPresentsMaster Class,” a cinema-quality, on-cam- era conversation that is edited into something like a monologue about themeaningof life.Thefirst episodes of “MasterClass” feature Jay-Z and Diane Sawyer; forth- comingepisodeswill featuremore larger-than-life personalities: Si- monCowell,MayaAngelou,Lorne Michaels—a group of peoplewho could be thought of as Almost as Big asOprah. Thepointhereistoextract their


wisdomandreassembleit inaway that is edifying and absorbing. It’s not an interview with Oprah, per se,who appears only occasionally to provide narration or effuse. In- stead, “Master Class” ismore like Oprah’s version of one of those too-slick biographical films of presidential candidates shown at election-year conventions.


The rest of OWN, for the time


being, more resembles that end- less supply of how-to shows and busy-mom shows and that-looks- delicious shows that cableviewers already spend so much time watching. And then, without warning,


OWNfinds its sweet spotwith the story of a woman who can reach sexual climaxonlywiththehelpof an overturned purple laundry basket. Placed just so. Oh. Thatwould be the first episode


of “In the Bedroomwith Dr. Lau- ra Berman,” a sex-therapy show that, if nothing else, fully illus- tratesOprah’sdevotionto thebar- ing of personal details. Itwas she, after all,whobroughtDr.Mehmet Oz into national renown for his ability to get us talking about the sizeandshapeofour excrement— especiallyOprah’s ownoutput. Likewise, sex. The upbeat and


no-nonsense Berman, who’s had her own radio showfor awhile on Winfrey’s Harpo satellite net- work, goes to people’s homes and talks to themabout their lacklus- ter sex lives. From the first epi- sode, Berman obliterates whatev- er residualblushingremains from the olden days when Dr. Ruth Westheimer talked about vibra- tors and lubricant on late-night call-inshows. “In the Bedroom” takes one


question (such as, “What can I do about the fact that my husband and I haven’t had sex in five months?”) and visits the home of the questioner, putting an every- day couple through a grueling crash course in sex therapy. If OWN were more cynically de- vised, “In the Bedroom” would be on constantly, while the nation sits raptwithmesmerized embar- rassment. It’s that good, and it’s likely thenetwork’s surefire hit. Berman arrives in suburban


Wisconsin to visit Becky, 33, and Steve, 36. They have two kids. She works full time and he mostly stays at home doing the chores— which is such a turnoff, Becky says.Shewantsatake-chargeman who will “wear the pants” and boss her around a little, especially between the sheets. But, as the doctor quickly ascertains, Becky


ROBIN LAYTON/OWN “OPRAH PRESENTSMASTERCLASS”:Acinema-quality, on-camera conversation that is edited into something like a monologue about the meaning of life.


has troubles with her own bossi- ness. “Ihate that Idon’t respecthim,”


Becky says. We hate it, too, and feel awful


for Steve; perhaps a bit less so when Becky finally reveals to Ber- man that one of the problems in the bedroomis that a crucial part of Steve is “too large.”Hemanages the most subtle smile here, and the viewer no longer feels quite so bad for him. Intheir 15 years together,Becky


has somehowbecome addicted to the laundry basket, overturned so she can lean on it for maximized satisfaction — a trick she learned on her own and nowincorporates into the couple’s lovemaking. (Oh, I’ve certainly said too much now. Frantic editors are poised to back- space over whatever else I type about the laundry basket from here on.) “In the Bedroom” illustrates


one of Oprah’s and OWN’s core missions: to create a safe space wherewecantalkaboutanything, presuming a level ofmaturity and openness that Oprah worked nearly three decades to create in her audiences. OWNasks us ifwe are able todeal—indeed, ifwe are readytodeal—withanysubject in the frankest possiblemanner.


It’s difficult to launch an entire


network at once and hope for a cohesive identity, but I’m struck by OWN’s consistency. Although the shows aremade by a variety of production outfits, the basic ten- ets of living Oprah-style come through loud and clear: 1. Stuff is only stuff. 2. Parenting is golden. 3.You are special. OWNappears to be building its


case deliberately, but the network also easily succumbs to contriv- ance in the name of reality. Some of the programming feels either familiar or thin. “Enough Already,” a home de-


cluttering show, ishosted byPeter Walsh, anAustralian-bornprofes- sionalorganizerwhoseveralyears ago de-cluttered on “Clean Sweep,” a less sassy version of the Style network’s hit show “Clean House.” Except for A&E’s “Hoarders,”


which delves into the stench and filth of diagnosed mental illness,


feel like youwant to be in another family,” which brings Hank to tears. And so he unplugs for a week,


RAHOUL GHOSE/OWN


“KIDNAPPED BYTHEKIDS”: The result of a parent committing OWN’s cardinal sin of ForgettingWhat’s Really Important.


shows about clutter follow a set path:Wedescendonahouseover- come by stacks of paper and laun- dry, boxes of who-knows-what, bric-a-brac gathering dust, and then attempt to separate the 90 percent that is trash from the 10 percent that is treasure. “Enough Already” also extracts the tears (nobody gets a living roomredone for free around here) and imparts its lesson of . . . well, it’s tricky. Clutter shows walk a fine line betweenanti-consumerhectoring and promoting good organizing and cleaning habits, courtesy of advertisers’ helpful organizing and cleaning products, which


meansmore shopping. Every show on OWN has a les-


son, and some are more scolding than others. “Kidnapped by the Kids” is after parents who spend too much time traveling for busi- ness (makingmoney, in this econ- omy — the nerve of them!) or staying late at the office and then obsessing over their BlackBerrys once they get home for dinner. Hank, a 30-something travel-


ing businessman, is intercepted by his 10-year-old daughter and 7-year-old son at LAX before he cancatchyet another flight to San Jose.His sontellsHankthatall the business travelhedoes “makesme


skips work and allows the chil- dren to take himcamping, swim- ming, shopping. It’s these sorts of shows where every shot begins to feel stagy; the subjects begin to speak and narrate for the camera inways that sound rehearsed and repetitious. We never learn what Hank actuallydoes for a living; all we knowis that he does toomuch of it. He has committed OWN’s cardinal sin of Forgetting What’s Really Important.


Spirit — which is to say the


spiritual world, religion, faith, both specific and amorphous ideas of God—certainly qualifies as one ofOWN’s favorite topics. This couldbe thenetwork’s sur-


est path to originality, treating with tender care the mysteries of


“ Metro Weekly Leonard Bernstein’s


Ring in the NewYear at a dazzling classical concert conducted byMurry Sidlin and performed by members of the National Symphony Orchestra featuring soprano Alyson Cambridge and baritone EricOwens.


MUSICBY J. Strauss Jr., Bizet, Dvor ˇák, Tchaikovsky,and Piazzolla


PLUS! RAVEL’S BOLÉRO ·Selections from PORGYANDBESS ONTHETOWN·SOUTHPACIFIC


Fri., Dec. 31 at 8:30, Concert Hall Tickets $50–$95


As abonus for attending any New Year’s Eve event, you’re invited to the Grand Foyer Party from 11 p.m. until 1a.m., free with your Dec. 31 evening performance ticket or receipt from the Roof Terrace Restaurant that evening.


The Kennedy Center’s Grand Foyer Party is made possible by The Morris and Gwendolyn Cafritz Foundation.


Tickets at the Box Office or charge by phone (202) 467-4600 Order online at kennedy-center.org|Groups (202) 416-8400|TTY (202) 416-8524


WPAS.org • (202) 467-4600 ” OWN


“INTHEBEDROOMWITHDR. LAURABERMAN”:We’ve come a long way, baby, since the days of Dr.Ruth.


What’s on OWN The OprahWinfrey Network (OWN) debuts Saturday at noon on stations previously known as Discovery Health (check with your cable or satellite provider or try a channel locator device at Oprah.com).Winfrey will start things off herself, hosting a one-hour show detailing the network’s programs. l Oprah Presents Master Class (one hour) has a preview episode Saturday at 7 p.m. (featuring Jay-Z); regular episodes (beginning with Diane Sawyer) start next Sunday at 10 p.m. l In the Bedroom with Dr. Laura Berman (one hour) debuts Monday, Jan. 3, at 10 p.m. l Enough Already (one hour) has a preview episode Saturday at 3 p.m.; series airs Monday, Jan. 3, at 8 p.m. l Kidnapped by the Kids (one hour) has a preview episode Saturday at 1 p.m.; series will return in the spring. l Miracle Detectives (one hour) has a preview episode Saturday at 5 p.m.; series airs Wednesday, Jan. 5, at 10 p.m. l The Gayle King Show (one hour) will air weekdays at 10 a.m. beginning Monday, Jan. 10.


faith. “Miracle Detectives” re- minds me of a combination of “The X-Files” and those shows where people spend a lot of time not finding ghosts. Here,askepticalneuroscientist


and a Rolling Stone writer who has experienced a religious awak- ening get to travel around and investigate situations in which people strongly believe that a su- preme being has intervened. This takes them to an old


church in Chimayo,N.M., to see if the dirt there really has healing powers. The spiritually minded writer is naturally enthralled by the story of a woman who was cured of cancerous bone lesions after touching the dirt; the scien- tist derives from a lab analysis that the best the bicarbonate dirt can do is provide some gas relief whenstirred into a glass ofwater. Then they go to aNorth Caroli-


na hospitalwhere security camer- as captured images of what the nurses believe was an ethereal beingenteringtheroomofadying girlwho thenrecovered.Here, the neuroscientist enlists the help of window blinds and sunlight, and it’s case closed. Except that the writer still believes in a “deeper truth”—the great unseen. Which brings it back around to


a higher power. Whichbrings itbackaround, in


asubtextualway, toOprahherself. I’m only half-kidding about


there one day being churches in which Oprah’s image is holo- graphically enshrined in stained glass. And because she so tireless- ly encourages inquiry, education and basic joy, I can think ofworse things around which to build a faith-based organization. As amovement, Oprahismcan


no longer be contained in a single show ormagazine orWeb site. At its best, OWN carefully illumi- nates the Oprahway. At itsworst, the network is simply like any other mediocre cable channel, desperate to fill its schedule grid with shows that feel new enough to draw viewers in and addictive enough to keep them couch- bound. Eventually OWN, too, lapses


into showingmovies packed with commercial breaks, which in this casemeans repeats of “An Officer and a Gentleman,” “The Way We Were”and,yes, “TheColorPurple” —oldweepiesdisguisedas sophis- ticated chick-flick stopgap pro- gramming. That is the great discrepancy in


Fleming Candide 6 Renée


soprano


Hartmut Höll piano


Saturday, January 8 at 8pm Kennedy Center Concert Hall


“Hervoiceisasgorgeousasever… acreamy,generoustone.It’shard nottofallinlovewithhersound.”


~TheNewYorkTimes Now–January 9 ShakespeareTheatre.org BY TRACY LETTS. DIRECTED BY SERGE SEIDEN.


Superior Donuts


a life spent Obeying Oprah: She asksyoutolivetothefullest,but to do that, you’ll need to sit around a lot andwatchTV. stueverh@washpost.com


ONWASHINGTONPOST.COM Howbig anOprah fan are you?


Take our quiz atwashingtonpost.com/ style.


Marcus; BY TARELL ALVIN McCRANEY.


Or theSecret of Sweet


F IN A L WE E K!


OPENS JANURAY 5!


STUDIOTHEATRE.ORG 202-332-3300


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