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Summertime and the reading is funny, thanks to Dave Barry’s wildly twisted mind and way with words. His muse in the latest book from this prolific writer is his senior dog, Lucy, “a powerful, groin-seeking missile of love.” Apparently, the Pulitzer Prize
winner believes he’s getting old, and he’s having a difficult time accepting it. One day, after watching Lucy and realizing they’re about the same age (Lucy in dog years, of course), he concludes that to a dog, age has absolutely no relevance. It’s
at this point he also realizes that it’s been awhile
since he’s written a book, and wouldn’t a book about Lucy be a good subject, after all? Especially since books about dogs sell fairly well. Among the many poignant
observations sprinkled throughout the book, Dave says of Lucy and himself on aging, “If our lives were Cheez-It bags, we’d be at the stage where you hold the bag up and tilt it into your mouth to get the last crumbs.” Food, football and flatulence also play important roles in Dave’s life. Each of the seven chapters in
the book is devoted to a lesson Dave has learned, thanks to Lucy, but not before hilariously laying out pretty much all his shortcom- ings. The reader, upon grasping Dave’s observations about himself and others around him, will laugh out loud, then shake a knowing head. “Oh, wow. He could be writing about my spouse!” Lucy, of course, has a com-
pletely different point of view with each issue Dave has about life (which Lucy loves); people (she loves them); dogs (loves them too); Twitter (say what?). Dave seems to have an addiction with Twitter, and if it weren’t for Lucy, the poor man might miss life altogether. And that’s the point.
“Dave, your hair is perfect. Enjoy every strand.” Lucy. 64 THE NEW BARKER
www.TheNewBarker.com Dave takes on the cable company, 911, Florida hurricanes,
and AARP, “the American Association of Retired Persons Standing In Line Ahead of You Demanding a Discount on Every Freaking Thing.” AARP believes that age isn’t a punch- line; that age is about growth. “You aren’t ‘too old’ for any- thing,” touts AARP. Of course, Dave begs to differ. “Those of us drifting into our seventies and beyond are definitely too old for some things. Public nudity is the obvious example.” He adds, “Also, if you’re an older person who is not Mick Jagger, you are too old for skinny jeans.” The seven lessons Dave learns from Lucy are obvious. But,
“If I had to list the top five things that I am exceptionally good at, I’d go with, in no particular order:
Sarcasm. Ridicule. Hand farts.
Locating the bar at a wedding reception. Developing an instantaneous hatred for people I don’t know. I have a black belt
in instantly hating strangers.” – Dave Barry, Lessons From Lucy The Simple Joys of an Old, Happy Dog
it never hurts to be reminded of them, especially when they’re doled out and served up on such a deliciously self-deprecating platter of crow. Dave even grades himself on how he’s doing with each of Lucy’s Lessons, and the struggle is real. Our dogs are reminders that, through the struggle, we should cut ourselves some slack. Like this lesson from Lucy: Don’t Stop Having Fun (And, if you have stopped, start having fun again). Lucy is a good foil for Dave’s peccadillos. Come to think of it, most of our dogs are. They make us look good – or at least slightly less offensive – to others, including our family and friends. Generally speaking, if you have a dog, you, as a human, are already tolerable to other dog people, placing you ahead of say – cat people (joking). The book will have you laugh-
ing throughout its seven chapters. And then, there’s the eighth chapter, when you’ll need a box of tissues. Spoiler alert: Lucy does not die. In fact, the chapter is not really about Lucy at all. But, it does have a most valuable lesson. Thank you, Dave, for a perfectly
funny and lovely book which will be read anytime self-pity or self- loathing creeps in. Or a mailing from AARP arrives in the mail.
Lessons From Lucy – The Simple Joys of an Old, Happy Dog by Dave Barry Simon & Schuster, Inc. New York, NY - 2019 Reviewed by Anna Cooke
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