Harold & Ethel. Harold: How’s your new hearing aid dear? Ethel: It’s fantastic, apparently it’s the state of the art, latest digital technology. I know it was very expansive Harold, but it’s absolutely perfect. Harold: It doesn’t matter about the cost dear, as long as you’re happy. What kind is it ? Ethel: 'Quarter past three..'
Whoever coined the phrase "Quiet as a mouse" has never stepped on one.
Rhyddings Methodist Church
Watson Street, Oswaldtwistle are holding a concert on Wednesday 18th May 2011 at 7.30pm Presented by The Conchord Singers
entitled "Anything Goes" Songs from the Shows
Tickets are £4.00 which can been bought at the door.
“Solutions are not the answer.” Dan Quayle.
“A zebra does not change it’s spots.”
Al Gore.
“I have opinions of my own, strong opinions, but I don’t always agree with them.” George Bush.
And people have voted for these men ?
Always borrow money from a pessimist. He won't expect it back.
A local band seems to be making quite a name for themselves on the Lancashire music scene. The Inciders are a dynamic Ska /Punk/Reggae band from Accrington formed during the summer of 2010 with Vocals, Bass, Drums and Guitar they have a great passion for this style of music and they are able to give it the roots feel that would make you think you was in Jamaica. Your chance to see them over the following weeks. Sat, 07/May Sat, 14/May
The Alexandra Darwen Black Dog Oswaldtwistle
Sat, 21/May Railway Hotel Blackburn Rd Accrington Fri, 27/May Sat, 18/Jun Fri, 01/Jul
The Duke Of Wellington Great Harwood The Albion Inn Whalley Rd Clayton-Le-Moors The Royal Butterfly Burnley
If you are supposed to learn from your mistakes, why do some people have more than one child.
AA But American politicians don’t have the monopoly on strange
quotations, our footballers can give them a run for their money. “I definitely want Brooklyn to be christened,
but I don’t know into what religion yet.” David Beckham. But David has nothing on Kevin Keegan.
“Chile have three options, they could win or they could lose.”
Sex is not the answer. Sex is the question. " Yes" is the answer.
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Behind every successful man is his woman. Behind the fall of a successful man is usually another woman. 3.
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