SUNDAY, SEPTEMBER 19, 2010 fall tv preview I’ll tell you if it’s on on.
media noise and distractions, Post critic Hank Stuever right kind of shows to the right kind of viewers
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Netflix Nancy
She wishes TV could be more like the movies. She loves long story arcs but doesn’t want to pay for HBO and Showtime; loves “Friday Night Lights,” but doesn’t get satellite service. In her perfect world, shows like “thirtysomething,” “Party of Five” and “My So-Called Life” would still be on. Has been subsisting on stuff like “Damages,” “Brothers and Sisters,” “The Good Wife.”
Premieres Monday, 9 p.m., Fox. Grade: B+
Try these: “Lone Star”
Fangirl (and her mate, Fanboy)
When not penning letters to the editors of Entertainment Weekly, fangirl and chubby hubby continue to grieve the finales of “Lost” and “24,” and they’re a bit miffed that “FlashForward” flashed out. They’d like a complicated puzzler drama and a new espionage nail-biter — “Rubicon,” “Fringe” and “True Blood” are seeing them through. For comedy, they still hold “Arrested Development” up as the gold standard.
In addition to “The Walking Dead,” try these:
Your Honor
Has presided over literally hundreds of criminal and civil cases, all from his sectional sofa instead of the judicial bench. Prefers the courtroom to the crime lab (or the station house), but was raised on cop shows of the 1980s. What’s next on his docket?
Sustained: Premieres Wednesday, Sept. 29, 10 p.m., NBC. No grade necessary “Law & Order: Los Angeles”
“Law & Order: Los Angeles.” What can a TV critic possibly tell anyone to think about “LOLA”? 1. Palm trees. 2. The Doink Doink (a.k.a. the Chung-chung). There. You’ve been served.
Premieres Friday, 10 p.m., CBS. Grade: B+ “Blue Bloods”
Perhaps the best show for law addicts (and one of the more perfectly made new shows of this season) is actually a multi-generational New York police family saga. In “Blue Bloods,” Tom Selleck is the police commissioner, Frank Reagan. His youngest son (Will Estes) just graduated from the academy and joined the force; his older son (Donnie Wahlberg) is a detective; his daughter (Bridget Moynahan) is an assistant DA. (And grandpa was police chief before Frank was.) From street to courtroom, the cases-o’-the-week braid tightly with the Reagans’ personal relationships. CBS couldn’t possibly make it any more market-ready.
Forget all the “It’s kinda like ‘Dallas’ ” jibber-jabber you’ve heard about “Lone Star,” Fox’s new drama. Yes, it takes place in Texas and is partly about a big Houston oil dynasty (helmed by humorless Jon Voight). We’ve only seen the pilot, which introduces handsome newcomer James Wolk as Robert/Bob, a scam artist who is married to the oil baron’s daughter (“Friday Night Lights’ ” Adrianne Palicki) and is also in love with a nice-girl-next-door (Eloise Mumford) in Midland/Odessa. That makes for a lot of miles earned on Southwest Airlines. The scheme is being masterminded by Robert/Bob’s controlling father (David Keith), who wants to bilk the oil company and the trusting small-time investors in Midland. But will Rob/Bob be able to pull it off? And by “it,” I mean the whole series — it’s all on Wolk’s shoulders as the show’s star. “Lone Star” has an earnest, well-made feeling — just a shade away from HBO-ness.
Premieres Thursday, 8 p.m., ABC. Grade: B- “My Generation”
“My Generation,” on ABC, is a scripted faux-documentary about a group of Austinites who graduated from high school in 2000. When they were seniors, a film crew followed them around, focusing on their hopes and dreams. Now, post-9/11, -Katrina, -Iraq War, -’N Sync, -Friendster, -Napster (and post-network TV, frankly), the cameras have come back to follow the same people at age 28 — and they have not learned any lessons about having cameras follow you around. From there, it’s mainly tropes and stereotypes — about half the cast is interesting to watch; the others stumble. Yet there’s a tenderness to “My Generation” that fondly recalls those 1990s dramas about yuppies and Gen-Xers, only updated for the Internet age.
ERIC MCCANDLESS/ABC Julie Benz and Michael Chiklis in “No Ordinary Family.” Premieres Tuesday, Sept. 28, 8 p.m., ABC. Grade: B- “No Ordinary Family”
A serious-minded, live-action riff on “The Incredibles” doesn’t strike me as such a hot idea, but I gave “No Ordinary Family” a fair chance on behalf of fans of shows like “Heroes” and “Smallville” (i.e., relatable superhumans) and I think it just might work. Michael Chiklis (“The Shield”) gives it his barrel-chested best as Jim, the paterfamilias of the Powells, who survive a plane crash in the Amazon River, where they are affected by some sort of magic algae. Back home in suburbia they each discover new mad skillz. Dad’s now superstrong and Mom (“Dexter’s” Julie Benz) can run 600 miles per hour. Their two teenagers are predictably freaked-out. “I don’t want new abilities!” the mind-reading daughter squeals. “High school is hard enough as it is!” Wait until she meets the supervillains . . .
Premieres Monday, 9 p.m., NBC. Grade: C+ “The Event”
Although there’s no firm replacement for “Lost” or “24” this fall, no one is working harder to lure fans of both than NBC’s “The Event,” which has a minority POTUS, a la “24” (Blair Underwood), with a doomed airliner (with oddly Oceanic markings) that’s about to dive-bomb on his Florida retreat. Then — island-time-warp-like — the plane suddenly disappears with everyone on board! (That’s the event?) Laura Innes (Dr. Weaver from “ER”) seems to know why it happened. The chronology is everywhere (“23 minutes earlier”; then “11 days earlier”), but time-stamp titles are typeset in “24’s” comforting CTU-like font. It’s a high-strung mess. (Maybe you feel like a high-strung mess?)
Premieres Monday, 10 p.m., CBS. Grade: B “Hawaii Five-0”
“Lost”-ies can continue their restful recuperation and frond reminiscing with “Hawaii Five-0,” the slicked-up remake. H50 has “Lost’s” Daniel Dae Kim and it’s got plenty of island scenery (including beefcake and bikinis). Plus, you’ll never have to scrutinize the plot, because it’s all done for you. It’s pure guilty pleasure, a cheap thrill. Another plus: The island doesn’t move — you do, while watusi-ing to the classic (but remixed) theme song.
Premieres Tuesday, 9:30 p.m., Fox. Grade: D+
But run away from: “Running Wilde”
Everyone wants to love Fox’s “Running Wilde,” which stars Will Arnett (of “Arrested Development”; he’s also the spousal inseminator of one Amy Poehler) and also has another “Arrested” alum on board, comedian David Cross. Sounds good, except that the funny stuff falls flat, gets up, then falls flat again. Arnett plays a spoiled rich man trying to impress his childhood love, an eco-aware anthropologist (Keri Russell). There are some absurd, enjoyable gags (I give them credit for the tiny horses) but the premise gets old in about 10 minutes.
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ROBERT VOETS/CBS Jim Belushi and Jerry O’Connell in “The Defenders.” Premieres Wednesday, 10 p.m., CBS. Grade: C+ “The Defenders”
Meanwhile, Jim Belushi is entirely at home as brash Las Vegas defense attorney Nick Morelli in “The Defenders,” a cheeky procedural. Jerry O’Connell plays Pete Kaczmarek, the other (sexier) half of the firm. Jurnee Smollett plays their new hire, an attorney who used to be a stripper. I don’t sense a lot new about the show; even its Vegas backdrop seems too well-trodden. Another no-brainstrain CBS drama.
Airs Fridays, 10 p.m., NBC. Grade: D
Overruled: “Outlaw”
Jimmy Smits is Cyrus Garza, a conservative Supreme Court justice who is the son of a cherished, César Chávez-type hero of the left. In a car crash, Cyrus survives but Dad is killed, and Cyrus . . . changes. Into an “Outlaw.” After reversing his position on a death-penalty case (which sours his GOP supporters), Cyrus announces he is leaving the high court to practice law again, assisted by his merry but bratty band of law clerks and a comely, sass-talking investigator. “Outlaw” is so unfathomably ludicrous, so egregiously implausible for even the most suspended-disbelief viewer, that your eyeballs will hurt from rolling so much. And Smits’s performance is a pile of old ham.
Premieres Wednesday, 10 p.m., ABC. Grade: C- “The Whole Truth”
The seasick, fast-as-a-commercial style of ABC’s “The Whole Truth” aims to advance the “L&O” formula by portraying high-profile cases as a cocky defense attorney (Rob Morrow) and a driven prosecutor (Maura Tierney) gather evidence and rush toward the trial date. (Tierney replaces Joely Richardson, who was great in an earlier version of the pilot.) And I’m not kidding about the rushed part, even when measured in make-believe court time. “The Whole Truth” seems panicked by the notion of dramatic pace vs. short attention spans. It’s like watching two lawyers play a frenetic game of tennis.
Captain NonProfit and Suzy Do-Good
These two love “Undercover Boss,” “Extreme Makeover: Home Edition” and “Jamie Oliver’s Food Revolution” — shows that help the Cap’n and Suzy remember how they met: on a volunteer mission with Habitat for Humanity during spring break in college. What new shows will give them that color-coded cause bracelet warm-all-over feeling?
With a generous heart, try these: “Secret Millionaire”
Not scheduled yet but coming this fall, Friday nights on ABC.
At a summer gathering of TV critics and reporters, ABC showed edited chunks of its new “Secret Millionaire,” which does “Undercover Boss” one better: It picks an actual millionaire (such as, say, a rich motivational speaker) who then spends some time living amongst and befriending needy Americans — of which there are more all the time. When the moment is right (according to the producers’ cue), he then reveals to his new poor friends that — surprise! — he’s loaded. The millionaire then starts cutting checks to shelters, nonprofits and even the po’ folks themselves. And everyone suddenly feels so much better, especially the millionaire. Softies will weep, while us hard-hearted have all sorts of questions, starting with tax questions.
Premieres Friday, Oct. 15, NBC. Grade: Incomplete. “School Pride”
Also on Friday nights, NBC is pushing “School Pride,” which I never had a lot of when I was in school. Cheryl Hines of “Curb Your Enthusiasm” helped produce this reality show, where dumpy schools get a fresh coat of paint and optimism, so everyone doesn’t feel quite so bad about public education.
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