DELMER & CECIL DELMER AND CECIL Those Meadow Muffin Blues Gidday, gidday. Delmer here,
writin’ this article all by myself. Cecil had to take the truck all the
way out to Winterpeg to deal with Aunt Bessie’s sick cow. He sure has a way with animals. Fortunately, he didn’t take
the pencil. Well, it’s huntin’ season
and the lads had a meeting last night to start strategizin’. Elmer volunteered to do
the doggin’ this year. Last year it was Arnold, but he got this dawg-darned idea to strip naked and paint himself orange. Never seen a deer laugh before dat. Cecil was in charge of da
cookin’ last year but everyone complained. Three days of pigsfeet stew and yer arse is in tatters. I wuz in charge of the
beer, and again everyone complained. I sorta lost my welfare cheque at the Douglas
Tavern and decided to make my own. Had the same effect as Cecil’s stew. Well anyways, I hope we actually
git out of the camp and actually hunt this year. I’m plannin’ to, ‘cause I bought two shotgun shells from Uncle Edgar. I wonder if they’s the right size. Christmas season is right after
huntin’, so I have to git out and maybe get a part-time job. The missus always expects something nice under my artificial tree. Last year I got her a new antenna
36 BOUNDER MAGAZINE
for the house so she could watch somethin’ called Car-Nation Street. But seems them guys at the CRTC decided we all have to have one of them fancy dishes stuck on the side of the outhouse to watch TV.) Sooo… I plan to go to WalMart
and buy a VCR and have cousin Sal down the line tape the shows. Boy, I sure spoil the old girl. Well, got to go. I’m almost out of
lead and I got to walk into town to pick up my cheque, since Cecil has da truck. Hope Aunt Bessie’s cow is doin’ good. Good luck with the hunt lads..
save me a steak or 2. We get letters!
Dear Delmer How do you and Cecil stay married to the same women all these years? I am 55 and been married three times with four kids.
−Leanore
Gidday, Leanore. Well, part of our sexcess is that we get up at the same time and go our own way. She does da chores and I gets Cecil and we go and do the man thing: Canadian Tire fer the specials and meet up wit Cliff and Edward. Then we goes to Tim Hort’s and spends time wit the old gang and shoot da breeze about what’s goin’ on, which ain’t much. So you can see so far that me and Cecil is away from the wifes and have time to ourselfs. Da wifes gets a chance to reflect on how lucky they is to have two great lads like us to be
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