You may have behaved in a certain way to try to draw attention to the abuse


You may have told someone directly what happened


Often these ways of trying to tell someone are not heard, misunderstood and/or ignored.


The response you receive from the person you tell can have a significant impact. If this person believes you, does their best to be helpful and is clear the abuse is not your fault, this can make a big difference. Unfortunately some people might respond with indifference or disbelief or even blame you for the abuse. These types of responses can increase your sense of blame or shame and leave you feeling isolated, confused, hurt, and angry.


You may not have told anyone about your experience of abuse, and this can be a heavy burden to carry alone.


If you decide you want to disclose your experience of abuse, it is important that you feel safe and comfortable with the person you choose to tell.


When considering the right timing to tell someone, it may be useful to ask yourself:


Why is it important for me to tell this person?


Why now?


How ready am I to deal with their possible reactions, particularly if they are not what I hoped for?


It is important to focus on your own needs and look after yourself during this process.


A counsellor can help you consider the issues associated with telling family and friends of your experiences.


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