Counselling can assist you to discover and explore the effects of abuse.


Anger


“Admitting my anger was a huge step. Managing it has been challenging but successful.”


Taru, aged 43


Anger is an emotion that many of our clients express. You may be angry with the person who abused you. You may be angry with family members who you feel didn’t protect you. You may be angry with other people you told about the abuse who didn’t respond in ways that stopped the abuse, or didn’t help you to understand what happened to you. Anger can also be understood or experienced within the context of justice (or lack of justice) depending on whether the perpetrator has acknowledged responsibility for the abuse and/or has been charged through the legal system.


In counselling we will talk with you about the anger you feel, the effects it has had on your life and how you may express it in safe ways that create space to address the abuse.


Thinking I am to blame


The perpetrator is 100% responsible for the abuse


An experience of sexual abuse can sometimes affect the way you see yourself and the world. These beliefs are mostly formed during childhood and adolescence while your brain is still developing.


Your thinking may have been influenced by the role the abusive person played in your life. Generally the person who abuses is in a position of trust - such as a family member, a family friend, a church leader, a teacher or a trusted person in your community. As a young person you may not have always understood that some “trusted” adults are not trustworthy and in fact will betray your trust and abuse you.


Perpetrators deliberately use a range of


‘tactics’ to coerce and confuse children and young people in order to sexually abuse them. These may include games, treats and rewards, forming ‘special’ bonds and talking about the abuse as


‘being normal’. It is because of these tactics that children and young people often feel they are responsible for the abuse or that they somehow deserved it.


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