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and it’s been scientifically proven that they cause most of the problems in the world.) Twonesian vacations can be arranged by “Titanic Holidays” of Hallville....call Hallville 8 for further info.


OTHER POPULAR DESTINATIONS FRANCE. Enjoy a steaming plate


of snails in the medieval town of “St Bidet” in the Loire, or join in a local or national strike that the population seems to enjoy. Best time to visit...6:30 BRITAIN. Britain is a small


country that conquered half the world and now is leaving half the world. Be sure to visit the bowler hat factory in “Crumbs On Lap”, or the “Colonial Disdain Fete” in “Sun Never Sets” Wiltshire. Germany. (Also known as


Merkelvania) Spend a few happy hours in Munich, sipping a beer and trying to find a German. Italy. Go to “Naples” and enjoy


the “Gesticulate Wildly Contest”, or travel to “Sicily” to see “The Lucky Luciano” shrine.


WHATS ON PARLIAMENTARY LAWN: A


kiosk where one can purchase a selfie with the Prime Minister for only $50. Every Wed. from 10AM to 6PM. Auto Union Hall in Cornwall: A


talk on how to “Lead A Political Party and Save Water Lilies” by Elisabeth May, Nov. 2 at 6 am. Biff Bailey’s “Dancing Junebugs”


at the fair in Roebuck Oct 6, 7, 8 and 9 November: US election shown in


its entirety on the Sci-fi channel. October: “Hunting Deer in


August”. A seminar by famed hunter Henderson “Bang Bang” Leroux. “August proves to be a productive month and there are far less hunters,” claims Henderson. Also, there will be the brand new “Game Warden Tracking Device” on sale in the lobby. No-Tell Motel in Lanark Oct. 2 at 8 pm.


www.bounder.ca BOUNDER MAGAZINE 49


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