Reconnect With Your
stream, the triggers that create anxiety in us. Some of these fears and worries are justified — such as the toddler who wobbles toward an electrical outlet. But most of our worries are neither justified nor helpful.
g l
How we handle our fears determines how they impact our relationship with our children. Our intuition, if it is strongly developed, will help us understand what is truly worth wor- rying about and what is not. Much of what we concern ourselves with, especially with our first baby, is not really worth the tension and anxiety we create. Try to cultivate your own relationship with your Higher Power, so that you have a “parent” to guide you and to which you can take your worries before you manifest them unnecessarily.
We can’t predict our children’s lives or destinies, and if we love them we will always be there, accepting and validating them. We will be better parents, healthier role models, and happier people if we learn how to relax. One Tibetan master described it as “letting your mind sink into your heart.” Fear hardens us as we try to hold on to the familiar. If we are fearful, we want to stop the flow of time and change. But the cessation of change is called death.
Yielding to the flow of change is es- sential for life. Acting out of fear, our inner “juice” slowly dries up and, like a dead tree, we are easily broken. If we wish to continue to be full of life, we must learn to relax and yield, to flow. Like the young tree, we will be flexible and strong, ever growing, with abundant youthful energy. If we cannot relax, we cannot listen to and truly hear our children, and we
miss their messages, misinterpret their needs and wishes, and lose touch with who they truly are.
Acceptance is the hallmark of many Eastern teachings. To let tension go without effort, become aware of tension and accept it. This is an ex- ample of Taoist “doing by not doing.” If we worry, we tense up and restrict the flow of chi or vital energy. Let go and breath deeply to enhance the flow and allow yourself to accept things as they are.
Author Melodie Beattie says, “Ac- ceptance is the magic that makes change possible.” We are able to make the space for change if we accept and validate what is. From this place, for our children, we can be blank slates, mirrors upon which they can test their truths and know that what will come back is acceptance and validation. Working with our chil- dren goes on forever. Our children are our spiritual teachers. Who knew!
VIMALA MCCLURE is the author of The Tao of Motherhood. She’s also the founder of the International Association of Infant Massage. She lives in Boulder, Colorado. Learn more at
www.iaim.net
Based on the book The Tao of Mother- hood: 20th Anniversary Edition © 2011 by Vimala McClure. Printed with permission of New World Library, Novato, CA.
www.newworldlibrary.com
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