My mum thinks you are

really clever if you have an

'ology'.

Some people will spend years studying for them.

Agrostology,

Bike-Fix

Mobile Cycle Servicing, Repairs

Plus Cycle Sales

We also service & repair prams & wheelchairs

Tel 01254 887638

Mob 07958 235388

Mountainbiker500hotmail.com

J Dean Installations

Over 25Years of PVCU Windows - Doors

Conservatories - Porches Fascias - Dry Verges

Replacement Steamed up units ( PVC or Timber) All aspects of Building &

Joinery work undertaken. Fully Guaranteed.

No Call out Charge. Free Quotes

Tel/Fax 01254 608697 Mobile 07849 471860

NASA's Zero Gravity Pen

When NASA first started send- ing up astronauts, they soon discovered the ballpoint pens would not work in zero gravity. T o c o m b a t

t h e

problem, NASA scientists spent a d e c a d e a n d $ 1 2 Billion to develop a pen that writes in zero gravity, upside down, underwater, on almost any surface including glass and at temperatures ranging from below freezing to 300C. The Russians used a pencil.

DOES THE LITTLE MERMAID WEAR AN ALGEBRA?

Peace of mind for you and

your family

Murphy's old lady was pregnant and now the time had come. He took her to the doctor who helped to deliver the baby. She had a little boy, and the doctor looked over at Murphy and said. 'Hey, Murph! You just had you a son! 'Ain't dat grand!' Murphy was all excited but just then the doctor, 'Hold on! We ain't finished yet !' The doctor then delivered a little girl. He said, 'Hey, Murph! You got yourself a daughter too! She's a pretty lil ting ...' Murphy got kind of puzzled by this and then the doctor said, 'Hold on, we aint got done yet !' The doctor then delivered another boy and said, 'Murph, you just had yourself another boy, !' Murphy said, 'Doc, what caused all of dem babies,?' The doctor replied, 'It was probably something that happened during conception.' Murphy pondered, 'Ah yeah, during conception.' When Murph and his wife went home with their three babies, he said to his wife, 'Mama, you remember dat night dat we ran out of Vaseline and we had to use dat dere 3-in-1 Oil ?' She said, 'Yeah, I remember dat night ...' Murph said, 'I'll tell you, .... it's a dam good ting we didn't use dat WD-40’.

We make all the difference when it really matters

Suffering the loss of a family member or friend is something that words cannot describe - yet, as you know, it is precisely at this time that someone has to decide who will pay for the funeral and what the funeral arrangements are to be. That’s where our Personal Funeral Plan can make all the difference.

Peace of mind for you and your family

The benefit of choosing us today is that the complete cost of a funeral and the arrangements that go with it are all taken care of - nobody need have the burden of a funeral bill to pay, nor the worry of having to make such detailed arrangements at such a stressful time.

An independent family funeral

director you can trust

We offer a choice of three funeral plans to suit your needs and wishes. Whichever you choose the plan will be carried out by an independent family funeral director who has a long and proud tradition of personal service within your community. You can be sure your independent family funeral director will appreciate and respect local customs and expectations whilst offering the highest level of service.

Why purchase our Funeral Pre-payment Plan?

• Provide for the cost of your funeral in advance • Once paid, the cost of your Cremation Plan is guaranteed against inflation

• Payments in one lump sum or regular instalments

A pre-payment guarantee

By pre-paying for your funeral in advance you secure the cost of the funeral which includes the cost of the crematorium, Doctors fees, Minister and Funeral Directors’ services. Where burial is required we contribute a sum equal to cremation disbursements to the cost.

Take the next step…

For an informal discussion, or to request an information pack please call in or telephone your Local Funeral Service:

Great Harwood Funeral Services.

3, Clayton Street,

Great Harwood. BB6 7AQ

Tel: 01254 886866

Hyndburn Funeral Services.

Queens Road, Accrington. BB5 6AR

Tel: 01254 233133

Or complete the enquiry card below and return by post.

A Local Independent Family Firm

To receive further details on Funeral Pre-Payment Plans, please

complete your details below and return to your nearest Local Branch: Title: …………..

1st Name(s): ………………………………………

• Choose your own cremation or burial arrangements, tailored according to your own personal wishes

• Complete peace of mind for both you and your loved ones.

Surname: ……………………………………………………………… Address: ………………………………………………………………. ………………………………………………………………………… …………………………………… Postcode: …………………….. Date of Birth: ………………………………………………………….. Daytime telephone no: ………………………………………………...

the study of Grasses.

Batology,

the study of Brambles.

Carpology,

the study of Fruits & Seeds.

Deltiology,

the study of Post Codes.

Exobiology,

the study of Extraterrestrial Life.

Some people need to get out more.

27.

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