How do you like Macau?
I can’t get enough of it! – have you seen how much money comes through here? – It’s
amazing… Some of my bank vaults won’t see as much cash in their lifetime – shame
on me to admit it, I’ll have to squeeze harder. Anyway, you’ll find that I control most
of the debt of the casino operators in Macau. They came asking for money – as usual
– but I sent them on their way – empty handed of course – and later bought their
debt (evil laugh). Since then I’ve been mostly pleased. But not anymore! Numbers
are down, one less cent gambled away is a cent not in my pocket, and I don’t like it!
Macau was becoming sort a hobby o’ mine, piling up the winnings, but the money
stacks are getting shorter and shorter every month (sniff)…
Do you gamble?
With other’s peoples money, yes I do, but only at my casino! I’d be dead and buried
six feet under before I spend a nickel in such a foul way...
A Christmas
What’s your game, high stakes poker or the occasional blackjack?
Carol for
What you think? Slots, you numbnuts! There’s something whimsical about
the tingling metal sound of the tokens falling… I simply can’t pull myself
US$5,500.00
away from them. Sometimes I find myself rooted to the spot for hours
on end. Since it’s someone else’s coins, my slots, and my casino,
Some bloke is selling
I delight myself in inserting back the winnings till they’re all
a ‘genuine but slightly
packed inside in neat stacks – nothing like an o’ pile of coins
damaged’ first edition,
to make a man feel alive. I’ll occasionally play poker and I
always win: after all no one can raise a bet nearly as high
first issue, of the 1843
as me, so I just keep adding till they fold. Can be fun to
Charles Dickens ‘A
teach someone a lesson about humility, but it’s just too
Christmas Carol.’ The
easy, like taking candy from a baby – without the crying, seller explains the
kicking and screaming, much cleaner.
‘mint’ condition of
the questionable find:
What’s your New Year’s resolution?
cover slightly worn;
Spend less, charge more. Pile up profits. Make at least the
same as last year – if not more. I’d quit my pipe – do you know
the top corner of front
how much they charge? Considering this stuff kills ye, they
cover slightly shabby;
should pay me to smoke it! – but a man has to have his vices
most pages are clean
(coughing)... except for the few that
have some very small
Predictions for 2009?
brown spots; one page is
My profits will go down if I don’t take some action. I’ll fire a couple thousand,
slightly damaged with
close a few hundred businesses, but nothing too drastic. I’m known to keep a
keen eye on my ledgers but still expect to find room to squeeze a few pounds
a small tear in right
here and there. Still people will keep coming to my door to beg for the precious
hand corner, but has
money I have collected through many a sacrifice – some things will never
neatly been repaired
change – but all in all, I don’t think it will be any different from the years before. with archive paper; there
is also a slight crease
* This interview is fictional and should not be confused
on the margin. Still,
with anyone you know, even if it is just like them.
it’s a very good copy
of an extremely scarce
and popular book. Item
#330286820979 is on
Today’s Scrooge in not the old bat dressed in rags we
sale on e-bay for a cool
5.5 mil and is currently
remember from the books. He’s 50 something, a banker
stored in an obscure
(somethings never change) and loosing hair. While still
location in Katwijk
the epitaph of avarice and greed, there’s one thing besides
ZH, Nederland (SW of
money he can never get enough of - himself.
Amsterdam if you need
We wonder if he didn’t only agree to the interview because
directions). Oh, and
his picture would be published (for free!) in the magazine.
there’s free shipping to
We still wish him well as we know the ghosts will have
Macau so, if you’re a fan
a field day with him in their Christmas Eve apparitions.
(a really, really, really
BIG fan), here’s your
chance. Don’t miss out.
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