Y OUR LE T TERS
that she was feeling it was time, and that she was calling the doula. “Great,” I said reluctantly. I headed home to find our friends Tracy and Angela tending to my wife. “You should probably rest right now,” Angela said. I must admit, at 5 a.m. sleep sounded wonderful. I went to bed. Men have a difficult time relating to women during pregnancy because they aren’t pregnant. They don’t feel they’re participating, unless it is during conception or delivery. Now of course, during conception, life is good. During delivery, life is scary—and I don’t mean scary like scary-movie scary, but scary as in “Holy shit! There is something alive sliding toward me, and I don’t have my catcher’s mitt!” That kind of scary. Hours passed, and my wife walked around the house in circles.
After some serious use of a breast pump and lots of walking, my wife’s contractions began to intensify. Finally, after hours, and a lot of coaching from Angela in methods to try to get things moving, we decided to head to the hospital, an hour away. During the ride, I reflected on the fact that we were going to the hospital to have a baby with no anesthetic, hormones, or interventions. We did it on our own, with the assistance of our doula. And yes, I
uttered these words: “Honey, in looking back, she was worth every penny.” There was no magic, no intrusion, no voodoo, and nothing she did came even close to replacing me. We are eternally grateful to Angela for a flawless natural birth.
MIKE ZIBELL
E-mail
S I B L I N G C O M M U N I O N
Five-year-old Noah is a very hands-on big brother, and waited patiently for Milo to arrive. Now that Milo is here, Noah is thrilled, and finds much joy in wearing his brother in the sling.
TINA TOMKINSON
Lahaina, Hawaii
34 mothering | May–June 2010
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