ANSWERING THE CALL
BY NNEKA SAMUEL HOW AN UNEXPECTED PHONE CALL CHANGED KYM WHITLEY’S LIFE W
hen it comes to the story of our lives, there’s the way we think things are supposed to be, and then there’s reality, serving up unexpected, life-changing, in your face realness. For actress and co- median Kym Whitley, creator and
star of OWN’s “Raising Whitley,” reality came crashing in the form of a phone call on a fateful day in 2011. Whitley remem- bers her body going cold after the voice on the other end of the line said her baby was ready to come home. Baby? Sounds like the setup for a practical joke, only Whitley wasn’t laughing.
In one fell swoop, Whitley learned that a young woman she was mentoring left the maternity ward after giving birth, but not before leaving Whitley’s name and number behind. In what usually takes months, even years, Whitley had less than an hour to decide whether or not she would adopt the baby. “I was like, this is not the way it’s supposed to go,” says Whitley. “I’m supposed to get a husband, get pregnant, have a baby. supposed to be two of us.” Or, so she thought.
It’s
Whitley’s instincts, along with helpful nudging from her par- ents who happened to be visiting at the time, kicked into high gear. Whitley’s mother told her, “Go get that baby and change your life.” Her parents ended up staying for three months, helping with baby Joshua, and guiding her through the new- found gift of motherhood.
Four years later, Whitley cannot imagine her life without her beloved son. She likens parenthood to a roller coaster, saying, “All you can do is throw your hands up and enjoy the ride.” And while nothing can prepare you for that ride, Whitley insists an essential step in the process of adoption in particular, which she refers to as an active choice made out of love, is not having fear. “What a person considering adoption needs to know,” says Whitley, “is you’re not only blessing a child, you’re blessing yourself.
It will change your life in ways that you
cannot even begin to imagine.” Whitley also takes great pride knowing that her show is helping people have a much needed conversation about adoption, one that will hopefully take away the stigma still associated with it.
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If Whitley adopts again it will partly be because of Joshua, who has been begging her for a little sister. Though Whitley has not made a final decision, she is taking adoption classes in order to prepare. But not everyone in “The Village,” Whitley’s tight-knit group of friends, is for it. “They’re like, you can’t take care of one, how are you going to take care of two?” jokes Whitley.
Currently on tour with her comedy show, He Said, She Said, with David Arnold, Whitley is also gearing up for the 2016 release of her next film, entitled Fist Fight, starring Ice Cube, Charlie Bay and Tracy Morgan. While being away from Joshua (who is now in pre-school) is hard for Whitley, if there’s any consolation, it’s that she gets to recharge and refuel by travel- ing. And it’s not the destination, but the journey that feeds her mind, body and soul. “When I look at God’s work from the airplane, I think that just keeps me humbled and it makes me reflect on life.”
Whitley concludes, “I’m stronger than I’ve ever been in all my standup career. I tell you, babies are blessings. Got my show, got the standup together. Life is good.”
Be sure to follow Whitley on Twitter @kymwhitley. Season 3 of Raising Whitley premieres on OWN on Saturday, November 21 at 10 pm.
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