ARTICLE Sex is Life, Life is sex
How does this help you have a rich and ever-fresh love life? by Joy Hicklin-Bailey
Sex is Life, Life is sex. All creative expression in life, all beingness, has sexual energy at its root. Life is simply the interplay of masculine and feminine energy. Life is a dance of masculine consciousness and feminine light. How does this esoteric or archetypal knowing help you have a rich and ever-fresh love life? Simply because when all is made conscious through alchemical transformation, all sense of personal identity and limitation can be released. You love to make love because you sense its capacity for ultimate dissolution of opposites, ultimate freedom.
A sexual union is a dance between conscious, penetrating presence -the masculine- and yielding love and surrender - the feminine. This union is found in all nature, in all things. An awake couple that has learned to consciously polarize and also to dissolve into fusion, has a transformed, refined experience of sex energy. Physical ejaculation is, though pleasurable, of course and often relaxing, very limited when compared with conscious lovemaking between awake partners.
Just to clarify – this doesn’t mean that if you are a man you always represent the masculine, or that if you are a woman you always live out feminine energy. A heterosexual man living a full life knows how to express his feminine, a woman can live masculine energy. Gay couples, male and female, also move between these poles. With some relationships, one partner expresses more masculine energy more of the time, and the other more feminine, more of the time.
Your own relationships with different partners may have shown you different expressions of these polarities. The dynamic can shift and change for you each day or over the years, so that there is a shift in who is living the masculine, yang, leading polarity most and who is living the feminine, surrendering, receiving polarity most often. In any relationship, any time these polarities can be reversed so that a man (or the one with most
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male energy) relaxes, is soft, vulnerable and yielding, and a woman (or the one with most female energy)
becomes assertive, initiating, and penetrating with her presence.
If you play with these movements between poles intentionally, at home or in a workshop, it is fun and also full of learning and depth. It is a transformational way to experience your opposite sexual polarity more deeply. This allows you to let go of any identification or attachment to familiar roles - a polarised couple is often a stuck couple.
In awakened sexual intimacy, sexual partners come to each other in fullness rather than wanting. The man is realized as presence, empty consciousness, able to contain all life, but he has also physically embodies that realization. The woman has not only experienced the essence of love, but she opens so much that she radiates love itself, from her whole body. In her body she lives the archetypal feminine, which is, as women often are, paradoxical – the all- encompassing strength of absolute yielding, vulnerable surrender. You don't need to act out or try to be these qualities -rather simply consciously practice diving into your deepest essence. It isn't a doing or effort. It is a being, with awakeness.
Awakened lovers or partners do not meet sexually to get something (even physical pleasure) from each other, although this is there abundantly, in waves. They are not meeting to love each other in a personal way, although they will be available to give that love more fully than they could before awakening.
The union of male and female, of consciousness and light can happen inside the awakened human being. This inner alchemical wedding is a fine goal. When a self-realised man and a woman meet in sexually, the two polarities, male and female, yin and yang, consciousness and light, fuse and merge much more powerfully for most than happens within a man or woman. Both lovers are blessed with presence, love and
London & South East Connection - August/November 2012
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