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month 4


YOUR BODY AND BABY


YES BABY


How to deal with the jitters


B


y this stage your belly may, finally, be sticking out a little, you have had at least one


scan and seen your baby’s heart beating and you have passed the 12 week marker where the chances of a miscarriage are dramatically reduced. The reality that you are actually having a baby is now sinking in. It may also suddenly hit you and your partner that, yes, life as you know it is it going to change. Rest assured that you are perfectly normal


and


most couples get a case of pre-baby jitters at some point during pregnancy. Not only are these mixed feelings completely normal and expected, but they’re healthy too. They give you a chance to face your fears and feelings about pregnancy, birth and


82 YOUR PREGNANCY


parenthood before you are in the throes of labour, midnight nappy changes or suffering from sleep deprivation. Take this time to acknowledge the major life change that is coming your way. In fact the little being you are growing may already be turning your lives upside down by making unexpected demands on you physically and emotionally. Your lifestyle may have started to change already, from what you eat, when you eat, how you exercise or even how you spend your evenings. These changes may be welcome, but they could also bring with them some anxiety or sense of loss for the person you were, or the footloose and fancy free couple you were. Take some time out from all the practical parts of pregnancy to just think, or talk with your partner, about


how you are feeling. You don’t have to do anything special, just talking about it, or thinking about your mixed feelings will help to ease some of the anxiety you may be feeling, and bring you closer as a couple. Think about the kind of parent you and your partner would like to be. It


is also


really important to get onto the same page as your partner where parenting is concerned: you may want to co-sleep with your baby and your partner may be horrified at the idea, for example. The important thing is to talk about it before baby comes – not to set rules and boundaries as usually all your good intentions are chucked out window as soon as baby arrives. Getting prepared emotionally for parenthood is as important as making sure you have nappies and babygros in the house.


FACT


YOU ARE REALLY HAVING A


NOT ONLY


ARE THESE MIXED FEELINGS COMPLETELY NORMAL AND EXPECTED, THEY’RE HEALTHY TOO. THEY GIVE YOU A CHANCE TO FACE YOUR FEARS


You can also chat to friends


who have recently made the transition to parenthood as they will be able to offer you some reassurance. Remember though, there are also a lot of people who will be quick to share their horror birth stories or complain bitterly about the endless nights they are having, so if possible, it is best to avoid conversations like this. Pregnancy and parenthood, without a doubt do change your life dramatically, but as just about every parent will tell you, it changed their lives for the better, if not the best. YP


AT ABOUT 20 WEEKS YOU WILL HAVE A SCAN THAT SHOWS HOW WELL BABY IS DEVELOPING


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