RAF Widows H
An ENCOUNTER with the Association by Sergeant Fran Hall
aving been very recently widowed, some four months,
it was with trepidation that I first
of all became a member of the RAF Widows Association but even more so to go into the Lion’s Den of their annual weekend at Amport House. Maybe I was curious to see what they could offer in support; maybe I was a little ignorant, or maybe I just needed to be with people who understood what I was going through.
I think if I am honest it was probably a little of all three. I also had the added impetus that a friend of mine from church, who is also a member, extended the hand of companionship during the weekend, in order that I had a friendly face to turn to.
I need not have worried. Amport House is a beautiful country house, which I have been to many times to attend courses, or to act as Secretary for one of my secondary duties
within the Armed Forces Synod. One of the first people I met was Gordon Craig, the Principal, who I have known for a very long time.
I was swiftly introduced to Jackie Towl, the Chairwoman of the RAF Widows Association, who immediately put me at my ease. She said she understood if I didn’t wish to participate in all the activities planned for the weekend, but that I was most welcome. After coffee and cake it was time for introductions and the official welcome. Meeting all those ladies who are at varying stages of bereavement; some recent, and some many years down the line, gave me enormous comfort, as I tried to make some sense of the feelings and emotions which were running around inside me.
The ominous welcome for a new member was a ‘feel free to seek her out and introduce yourselves’. This at the time made me feel a little better but, as the weekend went on, it quickly became apparent to me that it would have been far easier to have ‘told my story of
widowhood’ just the once, rather than have to retell it many times, and reopen all the raw emotions I have been, and still am, feeling. Gripe over!
The weekend just seemed to flow. After dinner on Friday we had a guest speaker, who, although not to everyone’s taste, gave some of those present some help and comfort I am sure. I just wasn’t receptive to it.
Saturday morning arrived with me getting lost in the dark, on a supposed five mile run, but it ended up closer to nine miles! Maps are no good at Amport, when there is no street lighting!. Following a leisurely breakfast it was off to watch the rugby. Jackie very kindly said I could sit and watch it if I wished, and did not have to attend the AGM. Following the previous night’s emotions, I felt I needed to spend some time on my own.
This was perfectly okay throughout the weekend. There was no pressure to attend meetings or do anything. This quiet period
18
Envoy Summer 2012
www.raf-ff.org.uk
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