The owner of the local chemists wanted a holiday so he asked Paddy to look after the business while he
was away. He explained that all the products on sale were marked up in each section and the prices were on each item. He went on to explain the only difficult problem might be with the condom section, where all the regular customers would not actually ask for the condoms, but to avoid embracement, they would just say the price of, £1.50 for regular size, £2.50 for large size, and £3.50 for extra large size. Paddy understood everything and the chemist went on holiday, but left Paddy his mobile phone number just in case of emergencies. After a few days Paddy had got the hang of things and had even mastered the condom requests. All until a man came to the counter and just said £4.50. Paddy just didn’t understand the request and thought that £3.50 was the largest size. So he rang the chemist and explained that the man had just said £4.50. “Is he a small man?” asked the chemist. “Yes.” Said Paddy. “ Does he have a squint in his right eye?” “That he does.” Said Paddy. “And does he have a bucket in his left hand?” “Yes he does.” Said Paddy. “Do you know him?” “Yes.” Said the chemist. “He’s the window cleaner, just give him the £4.50.”
Paddy says to Mick, “ Old Seamus has been
to that new Audiologist at the health centre, and he says he’s absolutely
brilliant.” “How’s that then ?” Asks Mick. “Well,” Says Paddy, “He’s only been going for a fortnight and already he’s heard from his cousin in California.”
My mum and dad have a very strange way of Communicating.
Dad doesn’t hear what mum says, and mum hears absolutely everything that dad doesn’t say.
Aardvark never killed anybody.
All men are cremated equal. Steady on ladies !
5.
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