7. Tiger Lilly
One Stop Cash Shop 39 Queen Street, Great Harwood BB6 7QP 01254 888292
New Year’s Eve. What a wonderful time to assess your relationship and maybe make some resolutions to try and improve things in the New Year. Here are some words of wisdom about marriage. I recently read that love is entirely a matter of chemistry. That must be why my wife treats me like toxic waste. David Bissonette When a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him keep her. Sacha Guitry After marriage, husband and wife become two sides of a coin; they just can't face each other, but still they stay together. Hemant Joshi By all means marry. If you get a good wife, you'll be happy. If you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher. Socrates Woman inspires us to great things, and prevents us from achieving them. Dumas I had some words with my wife, and she had some paragraphs with me. Anonymous "Some people ask the secret of our long marriage. We take time to go to a restaurant two times a week. A little candlelight, dinner, soft music and dancing. She goes Tuesdays, I go Fridays." Henry Youngman "I don't worry about terrorism. I was married for two years." Sam Kinison "There's a way of transferring funds that is even faster than electronic banking. It's called marriage." James Holt McGavran "I've had bad luck with both my wives. The first one left me and the second one didn't." Patrick Murray Two secrets to keep your marriage brimming 1. Whenever you're wrong, admit it, 2. Whenever you're right, shut up. Nash. The most effective way to remember your wife's birthday is to forget it once...Anonymous You know what I did before I married? Anything I wanted to. Henny Youngman My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then we met. Rodney Dangerfield. A good wife always forgives her husband when she's wrong. Milton Berle Marriage is the only war where one sleeps with the enemy. Anonymous A man inserted an 'ad' in the classifieds: "Wife wanted". Next day he received a hundred letters. They all said the same thing: "You can have mine." Anonymous First Guy (proudly): "My wife's an angel!" Second Guy "You're lucky, mine's still alive."
And talking about relationships ! The other day I had lunch with two of my unmarried friends. One is engaged, one is a mistress, and of course I've been married for 20+years. We were chatting about our relationships and decided to amaze our men by wearing a black leather bra & bodice, stiletto heels & a mask just over our eyes. We agreed to meet in a few days to exchange notes and compare reactions. Here is how it went: My engaged friend: The other night my boyfriend came over & found me wearing a black leather bodice, tall stilettos & a mask. He saw me & said, "You are the woman of my dreams. I love you.." We made love all night long. The mistress: The other night I met my lover at his office & I was wearing the leather bodice, heels, mask over my eyes & a raincoat. When I opened the raincoat he didn't say a word, but we made wild passionate love all night. Then I had to tell my story: When my husband came home I was wearing the leather bodice, black stockings, stilettos, & a mask over my eyes. As soon as he came in through the door and saw me he flopped onto the settee, switched the telly on and said,
"What's for Tea, Batman?" STEAMED UP,
FAILED or MIST- ED UP
Double Glazing? We are the areas only true repair & replacement specialists
FOR ALL YOUR DOUBLE GLAZING PROBLEMS CALL THE EXPERTS
UPVC DOOR AND WINDOW LOCK REPAIR & REPLACEMENT SPECIALISTS. FREE QUOTES
FENSA Registered Company 27980
01282 835602 / 01254 882999 / 01200 469038
www.contractglazing.co.uk
WE BUY SCRAP GOLD
One Stop Cash Shop, 39 Queen Street, Great Harwood, BB6 7QP 01254 888292
9.
Page 1 |
Page 2 |
Page 3 |
Page 4 |
Page 5 |
Page 6 |
Page 7 |
Page 8 |
Page 9 |
Page 10 |
Page 11 |
Page 12 |
Page 13 |
Page 14 |
Page 15 |
Page 16 |
Page 17 |
Page 18 |
Page 19 |
Page 20 |
Page 21 |
Page 22 |
Page 23 |
Page 24 |
Page 25 |
Page 26 |
Page 27 |
Page 28 |
Page 29 |
Page 30 |
Page 31 |
Page 32 |
Page 33 |
Page 34 |
Page 35 |
Page 36