UP TO 50% SALE NOW ON !


Jct 8 M65 Opposite the cemetery Burnley Rd, Accrington BB5 6HG 01254 231133


Branded Home ware, Accessories & Gifts for all occasions.


Try our Yummy


Homemade Corned Beef Hash, Peas,


Crust & Red Cabbage. Only £2.95


Plus Fabulous Range of “Pandora Style” Jewellery Greatly Reduced.


OPEN: MON - SAT 10.am - 5.pm SUN & Bank Holidays 11.am - 4.pm QUIZ


What happens


if you get scared half to death twice?


All the answers are sneakily hidden in the adverts . ( Well most of them are, we have been known to miss the odd one out.) 1. Who had a hit with his Little Children in 1964 ? 2. What are rats unable to do, making them vulnerable to poison ? 3. What colour is Yak’s milk ? 4. What decade saw the Tower of London’s last execution ? 5. How many Olympic games were cancelled due to World War II ? 6. Who was Natalie Wood married to when she died ? 7. Who was the Indian girl rescued by Peter Pan ? 8. What Lilly has orange and black petals ? 9. Who first scored a century and took 10 wickets in the same test match ? 10. What film is based on Arthur C Clark’s novel “Sentinel.”


The Last 10p A father walks into a restaurant with his young son.. He gives the young boy three 10p coins to play with to keep him occupied. Suddenly, the boy starts choking, going blue in the face.. The father realizes the boy has swallowed the coins and starts slapping him on the back.. The boy coughs up 2 of the 10p's, but keeps choking. Looking at his son, the father is panicking, shouting for help. A well dressed, attractive, and serious looking woman, in a blue business suit is sitting at a coffee bar reading a newspaper and sipping a cup of coffee. At the sound of the commotion, she looks up, puts her coffee cup down, neatly folds the newspaper places it on the counter, gets up from her seat and makes her way, unhurried, across the restaurant. Reaching the boy, the woman takes hold of his groin and starts to squeeze and twist, gently at first and then ever so firmly.. After a few seconds the boy convulses violently and coughs up the last of the 10p's, which the woman deftly catches in her free hand. Releasing the boy, the woman hands the coin to the father and walks back to her seat at the coffee bar without saying a word. As soon as he is sure that his son has suffered no ill effects, the father rushes over to the woman and starts thanking her saying, "I've never seen anybody do anything like that before, it was fantastic. Are you a doctor?" 'No,' the woman replied. 'I'm with the Inland Revenue.'


What’s Proportional ?


The severity of the itch is inversely proportional to the ability to reach it.


The hardness of butter is directly proportional to the softness of the bread.


SELL YOUR SCRAP GOLD


Harrington Street, Clayton Le Moors, BB5 4DF. 01254 888292


One Stop Cash Shop, 39 Queen Street, Great Harwood, BB6 7QP 7.


Fully Guaranteed Paintless dent removal Paint free scratch restoration Victoria Mill Watt St Sabden


3. Pink


07802 989159


Give me a sense of humour, Lord, give me the grace to see a joke, To get some humour out of life, and pass it on to other folk!


NURSERY END GARDEN CENTRE


Tel: 01254 389611 www.nurseryend.co.uk


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