His wife heard he’d been playing a round.


TRADITIONAL ENGLISH CUISINE 106 High Street, Rishton.


Tel: 01254 882343


From January 14th to February 12th. Thursday & Friday Lunches Only


10% Off The Food Bill With This Advert.


Tracey & Gareth extend a warm welcome www.aubergerestaurant.org


Three wise men had been following a star when they came across this new born child in a stable. One of them was quite tall and as he went inside he really cracked his head on a low beam. “Jesus Christ” he exclaimed. Mary said to Joseph, “Quick Joseph, write that down, it sounds much better than Clyde.”


A blonde was speeding down the road in her little blue sports car and was pulled over by a woman police officer who was also a blonde. The blonde cop asks to see the blonde driver's license. She digs through her purse and is getting progressively more agitated. "What does it look like?" she finally asks. The cop replies, "It's square and it has your picture on it." The blonde finds a mirror in her purse, looks at it and hands it to the policewoman. "Here it is," she says. The officer looks at the mirror, then hands it back saying, "Okay, you can go. I didn't realize you were a cop


A traffic policeman pulled alongside a speeding car on the motorway. Glancing at the car, he was astounded to see that the blonde behind the wheel was knitting! Realizing that she was oblivious to his flashing lights and siren, the policeman wound down his window, and screamed, 'PULL OVER!' 'NO!' the blonde yelled back, 'IT'S A SCARF!'


PROVIDING CARE FOR THE ELDERLY FOR OVER 25 YEARS CALL OUR CARING TEAM ON 01254 396015


Situated in Clayton-le-Moors, Altham Care home is one of Hyndburn’s most prestigious care homes and has been providing residential care, respite care, day care and dementia care for over 25 years


4.


Set on the outskirts of pretty Lancashire countryside, Altham Care Home offers specialist residential and dementia care. All our staff are trained to ensure a level of care that is both to a high standard and provides a real understanding into a residents individual care needs. Our staff do everything possible to make residents feel at home, each resident has an individual personal care plan is regularly reviewed.


Burnley Rd, Clayton Le Moors, BB5 5TW www.althamcare.co.uk


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