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It is not only a joke but it is TRUE!


There's always one. This has got to be one of the fun- niest things in a long time. I think this guy should have been promoted, not fired.


This is a true story from the Word Perfect Helpline, which was transcribed from a re- cording monitoring the cus- tomer care department.


Needless to say the Help Desk employee was fired; however, he/she is currently suing the Word Perfect or- ganization for 'Termination without Cause'.


Actual dialogue of a former WordPerfect Customer Sup- port employee. (Now I know why they record these con- versations!): Operator: 'Ridge Hall, com- puter assistance; may I help you?' Caller: 'Yes, well, I'm having trouble with WordPerfect.' Operator: 'What sort of trou- ble??' Caller: 'Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden the words went away.' Operator: 'Went away?' Caller: 'They disappeared.' Operator: 'Hmm So what does your screen look like now?' Caller: 'Nothing.' Operator: 'Nothing??' Caller: 'It's blank; it won't ac- cept anything when I type.' Operator: 'Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you get out??'


42


Caller: 'How do I tell?' Operator: 'Can you see the C: prompt on the screen??' Caller: 'What's a sea- prompt?' Operator: 'Never mind, can you move your cursor around the screen?' Caller: 'There isn't any cur- sor: I told you, it won't accept anything I type.' Operator: 'Does your monitor have a power indicator??' Caller: 'What's a monitor?' Operator: 'It's the thing with the screen on it that looks like a TV. Does it have a little light that tells you when it's on??' Caller: 'I don't know.' Operator: 'Well, then look on the back of the monitor and find where the power cord goes into it. Can you see that??' Caller: 'Yes, I think so.' Operator: 'Great. Follow the cord to the plug, and tell me if it's plugged into the wall. Caller: 'Yes, it is.' Operator: 'When you were behind the monitor, did you notice that there were two cables plugged into the back of it, not just one??' Caller: 'No.' Operator: 'Well, there are. I need you to look back there again and find the other ca- ble.' Caller: 'Okay, here it is.' Operator: 'Follow it for me, and tell me if it's plugged se- curely into the back of your computer.' Caller: 'I can't reach.'


Operator: 'Uh huh. Well, can you see if it is??' Caller: 'No.' Operator: 'Even if you maybe put your knee on something and lean way over??' Caller: 'Oh, it's not because I don't have the right angle - it's because it's dark.' Operator: 'Dark??' Caller: 'Yes - the office light is off, and the only light I have is coming in from the window. ' Operator: 'Well, turn on the office light then.' Caller: 'I can't.' Operator: 'No? Why not??' Caller: 'Because there's a power failure.' Operator: 'A power......... A power failure? Aha, Okay, we've got it licked now. Do you still have the boxes and manuals and packing stuff your computer came in??' Caller: 'Well, yes, I keep them in the closet.' Operator: 'Good. Go get them, and unplug your sys- tem and pack it up just like it was when you got it. Then take it back to the store you bought it from.' Caller: 'Really? Is it that bad?' Operator: 'Yes, I'm afraid it is.' Caller: 'Well, all right then, I suppose. What do I tell them??' Operator: 'Tell them you're too stupid to own a com- puter!!!!!'


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