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SECRETS FROM THE


Teaching wouldn’t be anywhere near as much fun without the fabulous faux pas, enchanting exchanges or textbook transgressions that pupils come out with. These examples are sure to raise a smile...


Not that type of net ‘That’s a lovely net, but I


was hoping to see what the 3D shape looks like when unfolded and laid flat!’


Maths Teacher, Surrey


The opposite of bottom is... ‘I was running a one-to-one


Did she just swear? ‘I was running booster sessions


with a particularly difficult group of 11-year-olds, who were capable but disinterested and could be disruptive. We were studying A Midsummer Night’s Dream and I had meant to say “Puck flew down to see Titania”, but I accidentally misplaced the letters P and F. The look on the children’s faces was hilarious – clearly they weren’t sure whether they had heard me correctly. I carried on as though nothing had happened, but after the lesson I had to tell the Headteacher. He laughed like a drain and nothing more was said, but the behaviour in the group did improve!’


Supply Teacher, Hampshire 65 SUMMER 2016 FundEd


session with a Year 3 child, exploring the topic of opposites. I gave her a word and she had to come up with an appropriate opposite, so I said, “hot”, she said, “cold”; I said, “inside” she said, “outside”; I said “bottom”, she said, “fanny”! “No – like stairs!” I yelled, slightly flustered, “As in, I’m at the bottom of the stairs, you’re at the...”’


Teaching Assistant, West Sussex


Children can’t keep secrets ‘Readers should be reminded that


children can’t keep secrets! During a “people who help us” lesson, one little 5-year-old told us he “knew all about the police as Daddy had been stopped by them at the weekend and asked to blow into a little box!”’


Learning Support Assistant, Essex


Four-legged family members ‘Our Year 1 class were talking about


families and the names for mummies and daddies of different species. One child was convinced that cats and dogs were from the same family because they both lived in his house!’


Primary School Teacher, Lancashire


Get in touch!


Share your photos and stories with us – email editorial@ funded.org.uk.


IMAGES: NINELL_ART; MASSONSTOCK; NASTCO/THINKSTOCK.CO.UK DOG : RASULOVS/THINKSTOCK.CO.UK WOMAN: PHOTODISC/THINKSTOCK.CO.UK


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