NEW ZEALAND
P
erfection is a rare and beautiful thing, so when you achieve it it’s important that someone is there to
witness what you’ve done and tell you how clever you are. My latest perfect moment came – entirely
unwitnessed, dammit – on a golf course called Jack’s Point (
jackspoint.com/golf) just outside Queenstown. From the elevated 18th tee a valley yawns below, bordered by the mirror-flat water of Lake Wakatipu on the left and right and Mordor in front. For the four of you who haven’t read The Hobbit books or seen the films, Mordor is the region occupied by Sauron in the southeast of northwestern Middle-earth. (Although, if you are one of the four, that explanation is as helpful as a hobbit in a height contest, so let’s just call it the baddies’ mountainous lair.) Like all baddies, Sauron chose well, as this mountain range – part of the popular ski range The Remarkables in real life – is dramatic, beautiful and imposing, the kind that makes one quake at the thought of tectonic plates scraping together. So there I was, wiggling my bottom on the 18th tee, practice swings out of the
68 — aspire september 2014
way, and feeling more than a little sense of one-off occasion. It was the best drive of my life. It flew high and true and straight at Mordor, and lingered in the air long enough for me to enjoy a few seconds of bliss, before landing in the middle of the fairway. Fist pump, fist pump, boogie. That moment alone was worth the NZ$175 (£88) green fee. My visit to the most famous local golf course, The Hills (
thehills.co.nz), was no less dramatic thanks to a woman called Choppy and her helicopter. She is the founder of Over the Top (
flynz.co.nz), a
ABOVE: Jack’s Point golf course RIGHT: Over the Top helicopter tours
It flew high and true and straight at Mordor – fist pump, fist pump, boogie
PICTURE: MILES HOLDEN
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