SUNDAY, SEPTEMBER 12, 2010 LETTERSFROMARGENTINA
Two grooms, one wedding planner
Couples prepare as country legalizes gaymarriage
BY JUAN FORERO IN BUENOS AIRES
S
ergio Donoso is gay and says he loves feathers. So on this day, in Andrea Pipkin’s party favors shop, he draped awhite feather boa around his neck, donning
plastic neon sunglasses and a goofy silver-topped hat. “I’mgoingwith the feathers,”Donoso, 38, said. “I don’t
care if it’s gay or not, I like it, and that’s it.” His advisers cooed in approval. “Precious, just precious,”VanesaMarini said, checking
off her to-do list. And so it was all afternoon as
Donoso, with Marini and her business associate,MiriamPerez, at his side, careered across the capital preparing for Donoso’s October wedding to Natalio Kus- nir. The men have been partners for 17 years but now, after Argen- tine lawmakers in July made same-sex marriage legal, they will take the plunge. The law has prompted wed-
ding planners across Buenos Ai- res to retool for a new market: gay couples, who say they are partying in joyous style after Argentina became the first Latin American country to permit cou- ples of the same sex to exchange vows. Gay leaders say there have
been more than 140 same-sex weddings nationwide, with an- other 120 expected before the end of themonth. For Donoso, the change in law
meant rushing to wedding pro- viders on a recent rainy day, choosing cupcakes fromtheDeli- cias Gourmet bakery, visiting a caterer and renting party hats from Pipkin’s shop. Marini and Perez were there, taking copious notes, offering counseling and making the arrangements. Their business is called Gay
Planners, founded in 2009 as efforts to legalize same-sex mar- riage gained momentum in Ar- gentina. Now, they anticipate
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planning an average of four wed- dings amonth. “The market is wide open for
weddings, and our workdays have been nonstop,” saidMarini. “We are now offering lots of packages, options so they can celebrate with everything they have.” This is a strongly Catholic
countrywhere a pioneer image of manhood is celebrated, whether it’s the rugged cowboy taming the frontier or the stoic immi- grant who worked the stock- yards. Argentina’s famous popu- list leader, Juan Peron, heralded his iconic countrymen and showed little patience for homo- sexuals. “They’re a sign of decadence,”
Peron once told a biographer. But Buenos Aires has in recent
years become something of a gay mecca. The city is home to hotels such
as the Axel, part of a luxury chain that calls itself the first in the world for same-sex couples, and
PHOTOS BY SILVINA FRYDLEWKSKY FOR THE WASHINGTON POST Groom-to-be Sergio Donoso tries on a tux atMatices as his wedding planner,VanesaMarini, stands by to offer advice.
has gay-friendly districts filled with bars and restaurants. There is a center for gay senior citizens, andmusic halls cater tomenwho want to tango together. That does not mean there
aren’t hurdles for those planning a same-sex wedding, as became apparent to Donoso during a stop in Tito Samelnik’s tuxedo rental shop,Matices. For nearly 40 years, Samelnik
has dressed Argentina’s rich and famous, from soccer great Diego Maradona to Guillermo Francel- la, an actor in Argentina’s recent Oscar-winning “The Secret in Their Eyes.” But Samelnik, who says he
likes to get to the point, told Donoso that he is accustomed to straight couples. “I am used to dressing aman and awoman, not aman and aman,” he said. Samelnik then measured
Donoso(thin, about 5 feet, 8 inch- es) and asked about his partner (tall and at well over 200 pounds). “What I always look for is an
equilibrium, harmony,” Samelnik explained. “I cannot have one of
With help fromMarini, Donoso pulls together a party look.
you wearing a smoking jacket and the other in black tie.” Donoso, who runs aWeb site,
liked a tux that came with a dotted vest. But he took Samel- nik’s advice, opting instead for conservative black, tightly tai- lored,withwhite suspenders and
an elegant striped tie. “No one can overshadow your
big day,” Marini told Donoso, approvingly. Bymid-afternoon,Donoso had
already accomplished half of what he had set out to do but admitted being a ball of nerves.
“There’s only two months
left!” he explained. “This is such a big event for us, and it means running around, making deci- sions, buying things, this and that.” Marini smiled as she listened
to her client and said shewas not surprised. Gay couples, she said, have
spent asmuch as $25,000 on the big day, far outspending their heterosexual counterparts. As in the United States, gays in Argen- tina are relatively well-educated and upwardlymobile. For this wedding, she noted,
Donoso and Kusnir went all out. Formusic, theyhired a sextet and a top-notchDJ. The dinnermenu includes sushi aswell asMexican and Argentine delicacies. So even though Gay Planners
is there to plan every stage, Marini said that Donoso and Kusnir, who works in a bank, have been there, too. “In typicalweddings here, usu-
ally the woman preoccupies her- self with everything,” Marini ex- plained. “In this case, it’s both men—a 50-50 collaboration.”
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