When Darkness Seems to Hide His Face by Larisa Cornelius


Darkness can take over one’s life in numerous ways. Our human- ness makes us feel the effects of sin that permeates this world. We face illness, pain, disappointment, family strain, pressure to perform, and much more. When a situation becomes too over- whelming, when too much is piled on, a person can begin to feel so enveloped in darkness that any hope typically found through Christ’s promises and love are completely clouded by the lies of this world — the lies telling us that we cannot handle the situation, that there is no point in trying, and that death is the only release. Suicide is an uncomfortable topic for most people. It can make


us feel helpless and panicked about what to do or what to say. In this discomfort, some “comforters” fall into questioning, blaming, or spouting rote verses to someone who admits to thinking about suicide (or to someone who is dealing with any mental illness). Aſter all, we sometimes think that if we really love God, if we are truly finding our hope in Jesus, we will immediately be happy. Or, if we only pray harder, go to church, or commit our lives to Christ, we will immediately realize our desire to live and “feel better.” While this line of thinking is usually based upon good intentions, it very closely borders (or completely falls within) the health-and- wealth faith tradition that teaches that our bodies (or in this case, our minds) are weak because our faith is not big enough. Yes, a relationship with Jesus does help some people find the


hope to keep living when they are otherwise feeling hopeless. But even people who love and serve Christ are susceptible to contem- plating suicide and asking “what is the point in living?” Sometimes certain circumstances can make life feel unbearable. At other times, a mental illness takes away our ability to make rational decisions towards life. In any case, suicide is not something people think about as one option of many, but rather as the only option leſt. If you have never been at a point in your life where you con-


sidered suicide, you may find it difficult to imagine being in such a state of hopelessness. It can be hard to imagine being unable to find even one small thing to enjoy in life. But suicide is what is leſt when all the light of hope feels covered by too much pain and when death seems to be the only way to get any relief. Tink about a time when you had a hopeless thought.


Perhaps it was something as simple as feeling that there was no possible way you could pass an exam. Or maybe you felt that you would never find someone to marry, or the doctors would never be able to find a cure, or God would never forgive you for that particular sin. We have all probably faced situations, either big or small, where hopelessness was creeping into our minds. Now, imagine that sense of “what’s the point?” overtaking one’s every


thought about life in this world. Te reason why it is so important to


understand why somebody would ever consider killing themselves is because the best way to interact with somebody who is considering suicide is to listen and show empathy. Consider it a privilege to have somebody share something so personal with you. Ask questions so you can better understand why they feel that death is the only answer. People oſten ask, “What do I do if


someone I know is considering suicide?” While there are many good questions to ask or steps to take, at the very founda- tion, the best thing you can do is listen and show that you care. If you are considering suicide, there are


a lot of steps you can take to get healthier, but to begin, reach out to someone you know and trust, even if it is through a quick text. Suicidal thinking will make reaching out seem pointless, and you may think that you cannot possibly handle any- thing more. However, we are not created to be isolated and handle our difficulties alone. Tat goes against the very nature God ingrained within us. When we can- not see any of Christ’s light, it will likely take people coming around us to show us where the light is for that darkness to liſt. Contrary to our first instincts, however, we cannot show people hope and light, if we don’t first show them that we care enough to understand their darkness.


Larisa Cornelius, Ph.D, is a provision- ally registered doctoral psychologist living in Saskatoon, Sask. She is married to Dave Cornelius, and together they are in the process of planting Bridge City Bible Church. In her fee time, Larisa most enjoys baking, reading, and trying new local restaurants.


Fellowship Focus, November/December 2018 11


If you or someone you know is considering suicide, the follow- ing links will provide crisis help lines in Canada and the USA respectively: suicideprevention.ca/Need-Help nimh.nih.gov/health/find-help


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