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unspoken fears. What happens to the house they grew up in if you get remarried? Will you move away? Make it safe for them to share their concerns. Assure them that you will always have their interest at heart. Prepare them – tell them about your friend, sharing posi-


tive traits. Prepare your friend – provide information about your kids


that will allow him/her to break the ice and what subjects to stay away from. Introduce the new friend casually, not during a major holi-


day or big event, and in small doses, not on a family trip. When it gets serious, have another conversation to address


any concerns or questions they may have. If there are objec- tions, communication is critical. Invite the family for a therapy session or perhaps someone everyone respects can moderate a discussion if the situation is explosive. The siblings I interviewed have a united message: the


approach, the first impression dictate ninety percent of how the rest of the journey will be. Remember two things – you have a right to be happy and even if things don’t start well, when the kids see how good he/she is to you and how happy he/she makes you, that can melt walls. Here’s to a happy New Year and for those who wish to find love, may you be blessed with “The Right One.”


SOURCE OF STATISTICS: Is Marriage Good for Your Health? By Tara Parker-Pope, New York Times


~Dorie Sugay is the Executive Director of Visiting Angels, providing living assistance serv- ices to the Santa Clara and San Benito Counties. You can reach her at dorie@visitin- gangels.com.


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