JACKTHERIEPE Winter snows and parked motorcycles By Jack Riepe #116117


THE LEAVES ARE long off the trees and while the prom- ise of snow is still in the future for most of the country, an early morning frost is a common occur-


rence. When the first snow comes, it is likely to be less than an inch or so and quick to melt on the first sunny day. Whether it is a light snow or a heavy frost, many municipalities will respond to this crisis by dumping 400 pounds of salt (per square inch) on the roads. Nothing eats a motorcycle’s finish like road salt, and so for many riders the time has come to park their motor- cycles for the winter — until the last three feet of snow falls, on the third Sat- urday of spring. This is a traumatic time


for both rider and machine. Many BMWs do not go easily into winter hiberna- tion. They snort and fight the dismal confines of the garage. Likewise, riders are at some risk of withdrawal. “Sudden Motorcycle Depri- vation Syndrome” (SMDS) is an insidious condition that manifests itself in a variety of ways. It turns normally docile and tractable riders into individuals who may freely express opinions about relatives acquired through marriage, fart indiscriminately, or anticipate exotic boudoir attention six times a day. Every consideration must be given


to the bike’s well-being during the three- to five-month winter layover. If the bike is to be parked in a garage,


106 BMW OWNERS NEWS December 2015


then space must be carefully prepared for the task. Begin by piling canoes, bicycles, sewing machines, garden tools, strange boxes (like ones tagged, “3rd marriage bridesmaid dresses) and other commodi- ties of similar ilk in the yard. Loosely cover the pile with a tarp or mark with a small sign that reads “Free.” The motorcycle will require a cleared area of six feet (minimal) in every direction. Hang photos of great highway stretches where the machine can see them. Also, many K bikes prefer their garage space to be decorated with the cen- terfolds of 1970s “magazines for men.”


motorcycle maintenance and will help acclimate the spouse to the aroma crucial closed-garage-door activities throughout the months ahead. The gas tank has to be filled with some-


thing to prevent condensation. This is an important policy at a time when gasoline is surging from fountains in public parks and is currently cheaper than bottled water. Some believe that ethanol is really good for fuel pumps, fine mesh screens and rubber hoses. These are the manufacturers of the stuff. Others believe that alcohol attracts water and the components of ethanol are claimed to separate over time, coating the guts of the bike with varnish and its byproducts. Try filling the tank with etha-


Mac-Pac rider Jim Robinson claims road salt and snow match his GS’s finish. Wash the motorcycle thoroughly but


gently before wheeling it into the garage. Linger in intimate areas, like the triple trees, to get all of last season’s crud and splooge off the machine. If you can get one warm day out of the current season, or have heat in the garage, put a coat of wax on the bike. Some waxes come with a distinctive scent. One smells like Irish whisky. Another car- ries the fragrance of maduro cigar smoke. Using a combination of these two infuses the garage with a true scent of winter


nol-free gas, if available. Mix in one of the highly popular gas sta- bilizing products on the market. I always add a shot of Irish whisky to the mix as a kind of seasonal “goodbye.” Don’t give a second thought about condensation, var- nish or byproducts. When ready to resume riding, you’ll just drain the tank into an approved con- tainer and spit in it. Then give it to the neighbor for his riding mower. You know, the guy who mows his lawn at 5 am on Sunday mornings. Now that the bike is parked, acquire an appropriate night table


with a usable surface area and a second shelf. You might even have an extra one in the bedroom. Place an antique brass lamp, with a subdued shade, on the top. A 60-watt bulb is permissible, provided it does not shine directly on the bike’s paint. Use the second shelf to support a modern battery tender, with reassuring LEDs that guaran- tee proper polarity, charge level and general battery mood. Some battery tenders emit a cheery little hum. This is a nice touch but it is not


lifestyle


Page 1  |  Page 2  |  Page 3  |  Page 4  |  Page 5  |  Page 6  |  Page 7  |  Page 8  |  Page 9  |  Page 10  |  Page 11  |  Page 12  |  Page 13  |  Page 14  |  Page 15  |  Page 16  |  Page 17  |  Page 18  |  Page 19  |  Page 20  |  Page 21  |  Page 22  |  Page 23  |  Page 24  |  Page 25  |  Page 26  |  Page 27  |  Page 28  |  Page 29  |  Page 30  |  Page 31  |  Page 32  |  Page 33  |  Page 34  |  Page 35  |  Page 36  |  Page 37  |  Page 38  |  Page 39  |  Page 40  |  Page 41  |  Page 42  |  Page 43  |  Page 44  |  Page 45  |  Page 46  |  Page 47  |  Page 48  |  Page 49  |  Page 50  |  Page 51  |  Page 52  |  Page 53  |  Page 54  |  Page 55  |  Page 56  |  Page 57  |  Page 58  |  Page 59  |  Page 60  |  Page 61  |  Page 62  |  Page 63  |  Page 64  |  Page 65  |  Page 66  |  Page 67  |  Page 68  |  Page 69  |  Page 70  |  Page 71  |  Page 72  |  Page 73  |  Page 74  |  Page 75  |  Page 76  |  Page 77  |  Page 78  |  Page 79  |  Page 80  |  Page 81  |  Page 82  |  Page 83  |  Page 84  |  Page 85  |  Page 86  |  Page 87  |  Page 88  |  Page 89  |  Page 90  |  Page 91  |  Page 92  |  Page 93  |  Page 94  |  Page 95  |  Page 96  |  Page 97  |  Page 98  |  Page 99  |  Page 100  |  Page 101  |  Page 102  |  Page 103  |  Page 104  |  Page 105  |  Page 106  |  Page 107  |  Page 108  |  Page 109  |  Page 110  |  Page 111  |  Page 112  |  Page 113  |  Page 114  |  Page 115  |  Page 116  |  Page 117  |  Page 118  |  Page 119  |  Page 120  |  Page 121  |  Page 122  |  Page 123  |  Page 124