When I say I'm broke


I Mean - I'm broke. A little old lady answered a knock on the door one day, to be confronted by a very well dressed young man carrying a vacuum cleaner. "Good morning." Said the young man. "If I could take a couple of minutes of your time, I would like to demonstrate the very latest in high powered vacuum cleaners.. "Go away!" Said the old lady. "I'm broke and haven't any money!" and she proceeded to close the door. Quick as a flash, the young man wedged his foot in the door and pushed it wide open. "Don't be too hasty!" He said. "Not until you've at least seen my presentation." And with that, he emptied a bucket of horse manure onto her hallway carpet. "Now if this vacuum cleaner does not remove all traces of this horse manure from your carpet, Madam, I will personally eat the remainder." The old lady stepped back and said, "Well I'll get you a fork, because they cut off my electricity this morning."


It Happened on February 1st


Music Facts through the years:


1949 - RCA Records issued the first ever 45rpm single, the invention of this size record made jukeboxes possible. 1963 - Neil Young, at age 17, performed his first professional date at a country club in Winnipeg. 1965 - P.J. Proby split his pants (again) during his first number at the ABC, Luton, the manager stopped the show and gave everyone in the audience a refund. The incident caused a ban on Proby's performance in UK concert halls and also on TV. 1975 - Lisa Marie Presley met her favourite singer, Elton John, for her seventh birthday. The event was arranged by Elvis. 1978 - Amstrad were advertising their new ranges of hi- fi in the UK, the 8000 system complete with 40 watt amp and speakers, £86 and the executive system with 140 watt amp, record deck, tuner, tape deck and speakers priced at £365. 1985 - Glenn Frey (Eagles) appeared on an episode of "Miami Vice" on NBC-TV. 1988 - The Cars announced they were breaking up after 12 years of working together. 1995 - Manic Street Preachers' guitarist Richey James vanished leaving no clues to his whereabouts. He left The Embassy Hotel in London at 7am, leaving behind his packed suitcase. His car was found on the Severn Bridge sixteen days later. 1997 - Two bouncers beat up Boy George outside The Ministry Of Sound in London after he tried to jump the queue where George had been a guest DJ. 2001 - Sir Elton John's collection of private photos on display at a museum in Atlanta, US, were withdrawn. The exhibition, included photos of nude men, which were said to be too explicit, some school trips to the museum had been cancelled.


A lad comes home from school and excitedly tells his dad that he had a part in the school play and he was playing a man who had been married for 25 years. The dad says, "Never mind son, maybe next year you'll get a speaking part."


WE BUY SCRAP GOLD


One Stop Cash Shop, 39 Queen Street, Great Harwood, BB6 7QP 01254 888292


9.


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