Ladies Night Wed 16th June 7pm - 9pm


Disability Scooters on display courtesy of Millercare


Friday 14th May Mobility


Fed Up Of Football


Come To Our Oswaldtwistle.


Motability vehicles


Vehicles on Site 10am - 3.30pm


Specialist Advice regarding adapted


Open Day Refreshments and Adapted


Refreshments Provided


Men Bashing. A woman without a man is like a neck without a pain.


The fastest way to a mans heart is through his chest.


Can you imagine a world without men ? No crime and lots of happy, fat women.


The difference between Government bonds and men is that bonds mature.


The mere sight of blonde hair knocks men three rungs down the evolutionary ladder.


The only time a man thinks about a candlelit dinner is if there’s been a power cut.


Men think monogamy is something you make tables out of.


When a man makes a woman his wife, it’s the highest compliment he can pay her, and it’s usually the last.


There are easier things in life than trying to find a nice guy…..like nailing jelly to a tree for example. A woman without a man is like a fish without a bicycle. When God created man she was only experimenting.


Answer on page 27. Clegg Street, Brierfield. BB9 5JQ


For more information call: 01282 616114 E & D Domestics.


NO CALL OUT CHARGES. SAME DAY SERVICE. LOW COST REPAIRS TO:


Washers, Microwaves, Cookers, Vacuums, Fridge Freezers. Sales of New & Reconditioned Goods.


We buy scrap washers Hoover. Hotpoint. Zanussi. Philips. Servis. Creda.


Gas Cookers Repaired


Open 6 Days. Sunday Call Outs. Gas Safe Qualified. 176A UNION ROAD, OSWALDTWISTLE


Shop 01254 383979 Mobile 07973 504775


Copper Wire After having dug to a depth of 10 feet last year, London scientists found traces of copper wire dating back 100 years, and came to the conclusion that their ancestors already had a telephone network more than 100 years ago. Not to be outdone by the Londoners, in the weeks that followed, a Glasgow archaeologist dug to a depth of 20 feet, and shortly after, a story in the Scottish Herald read: 'Glasgow archaeologists, finding traces of 200 year old copper wire, have concluded that their ancestors already had an advanced high-tech communications network a hundred years earlier than in London.' One week later, a local Lancashire magazine reported the following: 'After digging as deep as 30 feet in his allotment near Rishton, Bert Higgingbottom, a self-taught archaeologist, reported that he found absolutely nothing. Bert has therefore concluded that 300 years ago, Lancashire had already gone wireless.'


The Police have absolutely no sense of humour! I got stopped at about midnight last night and they asked me where I was going. I told them I was going to listen to a lecture about the effects of alcohol on the human body….. The Old Bill says, “ Who’s going to give a lecture at this time of night?” I said, “The Wife.”


Here’s a clue !!!!!!!


Who is this ????????


10.


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