IN THE NEWS
U.S. teams fare well at PIC in Langley
Wisconsin's Mark Olson rink fi nished second at the Pacifi c International Cup in Vancouver. Team members included (l-r) Olson, Paul Rudkin, Ryan Spielman, and Aaron Richards.
Many U.S. teams competed at the recent Pacifi c International Cup (PIC)
at the Langley Curling Club in Langley, British Columbia. T e Fairbanks (Alaska) team of Vicky Persinger, Cathy Shuttleworth, Adie Callahan, and Catherine Persinger won the U.S. division while Wisconsin's Mark Olson, Paul Rudkin, Ryan Spielman, and Aaron Richards went through the round robin with a perfect 7-0 record before losing the fi nal, 7-3. T e PIC was created to bring together club champions from British Co- lumbia and the U.S. to help promote grassroots competition and growth.
rocket exhaust
Top 10 More Tips For Curlers in the Coming Zombie Apocalypse 10] Even though your slider will allow you to skate quickly away
from zombies, make sure to keep your gripper handy for better trac- tion in case you have to suddenly stand and fi ght it out with them on the ice. 9] Maintain a low air temperature in your ice house and then just
// COMICS
bundle up to stay warm during the game — zombies don’t move very fast to begin with, and this will really slow their metabolism down. 8] Get rid of those ubiquitous carbon fi ber brushes and go back to
the old-style wooden handles — those fancy ultra-light shaſt s are total- ly useless when attempting to bash in the heads of the “walking dead.” 7] If your skip suddenly starts acting overly authoritarian and insists
that you now refer to him as “T e Governor,” it might be advisable to begin looking around for a new team. 6] Zombies do not care about which team “has the hammer,” they
care about which team is “carrying the hammer”— so by all means, make sure you are packing some sort of deadly striking tool with you while competing out on the ice. 5] Avoid playing in family bonspiels – curling may be a team sport,
but when the zombies attack, the number one rule for survival should be “every player for themselves.” 4] Always have an armed assistant acting as a “spotter” when peb-
bling the ice— otherwise you may inadvertently walk backwards right into the arms of a hungry zombie waiting to make a “happy meal” out of you at the other end of the sheet. 3] Zombies have poor eyesight but very good hearing— so employ
non-verbal sweep commands as oſt en as possible and switch to a qui- eter “chap and lie” game when removing opposition stones from play. 2] If your local curling club becomes untenable as a secure playing
facility, try setting up your portable icemaking equipment in an empty factory, abandoned prison, or deserted indoor mall. 1] Don’t be fooled by that kindly old “undead skip” with all the curl-
ing patches on his sweater who is slowly but surely shuffl ing towards you in the clubroom— “deceased-curlers-turned-zombies” are just as lethal to you as “deceased-non-curlers-turned-zombies.” – Richard Maskel
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usacurl.org ))
Winners of Pacifi c International Cup in Vancouver were Vicky Persinger, Cathy Shuttleworth, Adie Cal- lahan, and Catherine Persinger of Fairbanks.
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