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An online guide to events, night life and entertainment


TUESDAY, NOVEMBER 2, 2010


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Sculpture Garden Ice Rink, which opens this month, here are a few November events to enjoy. For more ideas, visit goingoutguide.com.


Before the snow takes over, hit the streets of D.C. A


fter last winter, it’s unlikely that many people are looking forward to this snow season. So before the streets start looking like the


‘DISCOVERING THE CIVIL WAR: PART TWO’ The two-part exhibit concludes with a collection


of documents, stories and photographs spanning 150 years. As part of the opening, the original Emancipation Proclamation will be on display Nov. 11-14. Nov. 10 through April 17 at the National


Archives, Constitution Avenue and Ninth Street NW. 202-357-5000. www.archives.gov. Free.


‘AFRICAN MOSAIC: CELEBRATING A DECADE OF COLLECTING’


The items on display in this exhibit of works from the African Art Museum’s permanent collection include coffins shaped like an elephant and cellphone, and a sculpture by Ousmane Sow, who will speak at the museum Nov. 20. Other events, such as a mosaic workshop, are also planned.


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Nov. 19 through 2011. African Art Museum, 950 Independence Ave. SW. 202-633-4600. africa.si. edu. Free.


EUROPEAN UNION FILM SHOWCASE Each year, AFI presents a collection of films from members of the European Union. This year’s screenings include film festival winners, U.S. premieres and mainstream films. Must-sees include “The Hedgehog” (“Le Herisson”), an adaptation of a French bestseller, and “Illegal,” a story of a Russian immigrant in Belgium that will open the festival. Thursday through Nov. 23. AFI Silver Theatre, 8633 Colesville Rd., Silver Spring. 301-495-6720. www.afi.com/silver. Most films cost $10, $9 for seniors, $6 for age 12 and younger.


MICHAEL BUBLÉ The Canadian jazz singer is bringing his Crazy


Love Tour to Verizon Center. With his recent hit “Haven’t Met You Yet,” Bublé is getting more attention for his unique brand of mainstream jazz. Nov. 30 at 8 p.m. Verizon Center, 601 F St. NW.


FILMS DISTRIBUTION E.U.-MADE: AFI’s European Union Film Showcase includes Belgium’s “Illegal.”


202-397-7328. www.verizoncenter.com. $55-$95. — Kristen Boghosian


PLANNING AN EVENT WE SHOULD KNOW ABOUT ? TELL U S . SEND LISTINGS INFORMA TION TO EVENTS@WASHINGTONP OST.COM


Xian Zhang, conductor • Gil Shaham, violin DEBUSSY


Prélude à l’après-midi d’un faune (“Prelude to the Afternoon of a Faun”)


PROKOFIEV Violin Concerto No. 2


Thu., Nov. 4 at 7 Sat., Nov. 6 at 8 Sun., Nov. 7 at 1:30


BARTÓK The Miraculous Mandarin–Suite


THURSDAY! CoNCERT HAll


BEGINS GIL SHAHAM


Tickets from $20 at the Box Office or charge by phone (202) 467-4600


General Dynamics is the proud sponsor of the NSO Classical Season.


Online at kennedy-center.org Groups (202) 416-8400 TTY (202) 416-8524


SHAHAM PLAYS PROKOFIEV


STRAVINSKY Le Chant du rossignol (“The Song of the Nightingale”)


Adapted from a recent online discussion:


Hi, Carolyn! I’m in an awkward situation that


I think a lot of other readers might relate to. My parents are deep in denial about a lot of things, from their culpability in my siblings’ and my stormy childhood, to acknowledging some of the difficult and stressful times we experienced later in life. As long as I play by their rules,


they are lovely and fun, but I hate to feel like an enabler and I don’t like the open disrespect with which they treat my life choices. They have been passive- aggressive and aggressive- aggressive about our careers and our chosen life partners — and conveniently denied this at the subsequent weddings! — while praising themselves for how successful we turned out to be. Every time one of us tries to confront them, they blow up or


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Get help detaching from noxious parents CAROLYN HAX


freeze us out. I’m the peacemaker sibling and the one closest to them. I feel that if I keep them at arm’s length, they’ll be cut off from all their kids, and I know they love us a lot. I know I should just give up trying to get them to be reasonable, but it’s hurtful to me. Help!


De Nile, a river in Egypt Hi there. I suggest all the time


that people consider counseling; I propose talking to their mates about getting couples counseling; I say that X situation is a natural for therapy. I’ve rarely if ever said, “Please get


into therapy.” Please get into therapy. Put in the effort to find someone reputable and compatible. Don’t be afraid to meet several therapists as if they’re candidates that you’re interviewing, because that’s what they are; you’re bringing them your business. Hold out for someone who clicks. Then, start digging. Just for openers, I think you’ll want to explore the fact that, in your description of your role in the family, the behavior you’re exhibiting — turmoil smoothed over by sturdy non- acknowledgment — is a next- generation replica of the behavior you deplore in your parents.


And, according to your short description, your parents are unapologetic boundary-crossers, while you seem to be stepping beyond the line of your business into managing the feelings of


NICK GALIFIANAKIS FOR THE WASHINGTON POST


your entire family. That’s another way you’re living by their dysfunctional example — unwittingly, no doubt. If you feel you have it in you to


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Theatre Company’s Traverse


Midsummer (A play with songs) Nov. 11&12


Terrace Theater Tickets from $25


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Nowthru Nov. 21 “EXHILARATING! Come join


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“Shrieks of laughter night after night.” -TheWashington Post


STAATSKAPELLE Daniel Harding, conductor Rudolf Buchbinder, piano


Tomorrow at 8pm Kennedy Center Concert Hall


Schumann: Manfred Overture Piano Concerto


Brahms: Symphony No. 2 EMANUEL


AX piano


Wed.,Nov. 10,8pm Music Center at Strathmore


Program of Schubert and Chopin ANNE-SOPHIE


LAMBERT ORKIS Sat.,Nov. 13,4pm


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Kennedy Center Concert Hall 202-785-WPAS(9727)


BrahmsViolin Sonatas (Nos. 1,2,3) WPAS.ORG


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Sunday in Arts. deadline:Wed., 12 noon Monday in Style. deadline: Friday, 12 noon Tuesday in Style. deadline: Mon., 12 noon


The Guide to the Lively Arts appears


Wednesday in Style. deadline:Tues., 12 noon Thursday in Style. deadline:Wed., 12 noon Friday inWeekend. deadline:Tues., 12 noon Saturday in Style. deadline: Friday, 12 noon


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start living your own life, honestly and with your own boundaries, come what may, then maybe the therapy isn’t an absolutely necessary first step. By “living your own life” I mean figuring out your own rules, and living by those, even when it brings unpleasant consequences from your parents. By living within your own boundaries, I mean paying attention to your own relationships with other people, period, and letting your parents worry about their relationships with their kids. Whether you get help or go it alone, you’ve got a steep climb ahead; being true to your feelings when you’ve been punished for exactly that, and setting firm limits when your life experience is of everyone claiming everyone else’s business as their own, can often bring unexpected and confusing results. But at the top of your climb, freedom is waiting. Trust that and don’t give up.


Read the whole transcript or join the discussion live at


noon Fridays on www.washingtonpost. com/discussions.


Write to Tell Me About It, Style, 1150 15th St. NW, Washington, D.C. 20071, or tellme@washpost.com.


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