HOW TO MAKE YOUR CEREMONY SHINE
by jason mitchell kahn As a wedding planner, a typical wedding day for me is filled with
many emotional highs, several minor heart attacks and an undercurrent of gratitude for being able to do what I love. Most recently, I planned the wedding of a very special couple, Rory and Gerold, whose wedding was one of my most memorable. Here’s how the afternoon started: I checked in with Rory and Gerold, at their hotel on the morning of their
wedding. I reminded them of the photographer’s arrival time and to make sure they waited for him to arrive to document the final steps of getting ready for the big day. “We’ll be in our underwear,” they joked. I could tell from their sense of humor, they were relaxed and already
enjoying the day, so I left them to head to the venue. There, I was overseeing set-up and the sound check for the thirty singers and musicians who would be performing in one of five different musical moments of their ceremony. While most of the original cast from The Book of Mormon assembled to rehearse the custom mash-up of “Love on Top” and “God only Knows” that would conclude the ceremony, I had to pause to take this moment in. Gay weddings are the best! I’m so lucky I get to plan them all the time. A few hours later and I was in my suit with a walkie-talkie in one ear and
a very detailed “run-of-show” in my hand. The grooms and their wedding party had finally arrived. I lined them up, making sure all their boutonnieres were aligned and told them it was “showtime.” As I went to cue the first
musicians and make sure the lighting and sound technicians were in place, I looked out at the eager crowd. It was a packed house near Times Square in New York. More than three hundred and fifty guests filled the ballroom and it felt like an impossible-to-get-ticket Broadway show was about to begin. There were no assigned sides; in both aisles sat a mixture of family and friends, old and young, gay and straight. Each performance received thunderous applause and the vows read reminded everyone of the urgency of love, seized as fully as legally possible. “And even if we stay in a shoebox apartment the rest of our lives, I hope
you know that you and our life together is truly enough for me and more than I could have ever dreamed of.” When the party started, guests would graze at several food stations and
charge the dance floor to hits of Mariah, Madonna and Whitney while I cued multiple lighting changes. The take-away-favor that was distributed at the exit reminded guests they could give to a marriage equality organization. The above rundown of a gay wedding is not an easy feat to pull off. As a
wedding planner who is gay, married and the author of the first wedding planner specifically for gay grooms, the number one question I get asked is, “What is the biggest difference between a gay wedding and a straight wed- ding?” I’ve toyed with different funny answers, such as, making sure the bar- tenders from the catering company are prepared to make unlimited vodka sodas or how the wedding band needs to be 100 percent up, to date on
WE’RE GETTIN’ MARRIED IN THE MORNIN’
FEBRUARY 2015 | RAGE monthly 21
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