Although La Bey began her caregiving out of love, the volume of related tasks soon sparked stress. That’s when she taught herself to slow down and reframe her outlook: Before going into her mom’s room, folding her laundry, scheduling healthcare practitioners and delivering dinner, La Bey paused to consciously ask: “Is Mom safe, happy and pain-free?” Centering on those three questions reminded her that she was doing this work out of love. Psychotherapist Diana Denholm,
Conscious Caregiving Nurture Yourself While Helping Another
by Deborah Shouse “
CEO of Caregiver Action Network, in Washington, D.C., and a former family caregiver. “For the sake of your loved one, take care of yourself.” The AARP estimates that some 34 million family caregivers provide for someone that is ill or disabled in the U.S. According to the National Alliance for Caregiving, in Bethesda, Maryland, caregivers generally struggle with fi nding time for themselves, managing emotional and physical stress and balancing work and family responsibilities.
I
f you’re depressed, tired or sick, your caregiving is likely to suffer,” counsels John Schall,
Experts suggest that the following
seven steps can help people enjoy a healthier, less stressful and more conscious approach to care giving— and receiving.
Reframe Care When Lori La Bey’s mom was diagnosed with dementia, the daughter initially felt she was the only family member that could help her. However, gradually, the Minneapolis-based international caregiver advocate and founder of AlzheimersSpeaks. com learned to welcome help from others. “Being perfect gets in the way of true connections,” she observes.
LOTUS Yoga Center
465 Oakland Avenue • Apopka, FL 32703 (behind Popeye’s off 441/Main)
352-217-2873
www.LotusYogaCenter.com
16
ZYTO Assessments • Massage • DoTerra Essential Oils & Skin Care Central Florida natural awakenings
LOTUS Yoga Center A Center for Health and Wellness Yoga • ZUMBA • Body Weight Boot Camp (Buy 10 classes, get one free) Workshops • Massage • DoTerra Essential Oils
Ph.D., of West Palm Beach, Florida, heightened her own consciousness by learning to see caregiving as a collaborative effort. Denholm, author of The Caregiving Wife’s Handbook: Caring for Your Seriously Ill Husband, Caring for Yourself (CaregivingWife. com), sought to keep her husband as engaged and active as possible. When she had diffi cult issues to discuss, she’d make a “talking date” with him, offering choices by saying, “I’d love to chat with you. Would Tuesday before dinner or Thursday after breakfast work for you?” Before the date, she’d select a comfortable room and clear her mind by meditating, napping or mindfully sipping herbal tea. The conversations would cover anything from how to work with their health professionals to plans for his end-of-life ceremony. They agreed on strategies and worked together as a team.
Redefi ne Assistance “I’ll carry your luggage for you, Dad, since you’re not feeling well”… La Bey still remembers her father’s downturned mouth as she tugged the suitcase out of his hands. “I was trying to be helpful, but instead I took away his dignity and power,” she later realized. “If I had packed his bag
Page 1 |
Page 2 |
Page 3 |
Page 4 |
Page 5 |
Page 6 |
Page 7 |
Page 8 |
Page 9 |
Page 10 |
Page 11 |
Page 12 |
Page 13 |
Page 14 |
Page 15 |
Page 16 |
Page 17 |
Page 18 |
Page 19 |
Page 20 |
Page 21 |
Page 22 |
Page 23 |
Page 24 |
Page 25 |
Page 26 |
Page 27 |
Page 28 |
Page 29 |
Page 30 |
Page 31 |
Page 32 |
Page 33 |
Page 34 |
Page 35 |
Page 36 |
Page 37 |
Page 38 |
Page 39 |
Page 40 |
Page 41 |
Page 42 |
Page 43 |
Page 44 |
Page 45 |
Page 46 |
Page 47 |
Page 48