the lowdown
(IM)PERFECT
By Jeff Matlow
F
or just about everybody in this world, there training. Then one early morning, in a sudden doing this to yourself?” Jon asked. “You’re a jerk.
are four seasons. In my world there are burst of Chariots of Fire-ness, I decided to do a When are you going to learn that the exercise
five: winter, spring, summer, fall and injury. 2 hour run barefoot, on the beach, in the sand, is actually hurting you, not helping you? Maybe
You can time it all by the sun and the rotation of on an uneven surface. It looked like so much fun you should take up something less impactful.
the earth. It’s like clockwork. No matter what in the movies. Like knitting. Or pottery.”
you do, inevitably the snow will fall, the sun will The edge of the Pacific Ocean is beautiful Mental note, don’t call Jon next time I get
shine, the birds will chirp and I will be limping and peaceful in the early morning hours. It is a injured.
and cussing. Zen-like serenity with the silent undulations of As I sat there swimming in my pool of
Last year, however, was going to be different. an endless blanket of water and the soothing frustration, I began to think about all of the
Last year I was going to be smarter – to defy the sound of the waves rolling on shore. It was the adversity I’ve encountered in my athletic career.
laws of nature. So I started my training slowly and perfect cinematic symbolism of my rebirth as It’s been years filled with injuries and sickness
cautiously, not building my distance or speed in the unstoppable athlete. I dipped my feet in and bad races and bad weather and flat tires and
any type of hurry. I changed my running form to the water, wiggled my toes like they do in the nutrition problems and and and.
one that wasn’t so physically demanding. movies, started humming Vangelis’ greatest hits “There’s always something,” I sighed to myself
One month rolled into two, two into four, and took my first step down the long expanse of as I plunged deeper into the vicious whirlpool of
and soon I realized that I was actually running coastline before me. self-pity. Adversity was bringing me down. I had
better and stronger than I had in a decade. I did Everything was great. At least for the first 60 enough. Maybe Jon was right, maybe I should go
a couple of races and, lo and behold, there was seconds. buy some clay.
no pain on the run. I could push and pass people It started with a slight tightening of my calf, For 20 years, I’ve been waiting for the perfect
like I did in my youth. just a little more than usual. “No problem,” I said season of training leading to the perfect race.
I felt like a new man. I had faced the forces of to myself, “I’m a new man, I can run through I’ve been waiting for everything to go smoothly,
nature and emerged the conqueror. “I’m the king it.” Five more minutes of super slow jogging where my body always feels great, where I
of the world!” I screamed from the proverbial with the leg muscles getting even tighter, and I improve on a daily basis and where, on race
ship’s bow. decided it might be better to stop and stretch. day, I suddenly start running sub-5 minute miles
So while I was feeling great, immersed in my So I stretched and then did another 5 minutes without breaking a sweat. For 20 years I’ve been
Leonardo DiCaprio moment, I did what any new of jogging and more pain and another bout of waiting for my training to feel just like it appears
man might do: I tried new things. I pushed the stretching. for all the athletes I see in the movies.
pace a little bit harder. I began to do a lot of hill I was determined to do my run, but here I was But the reality is that I’m not going to
less than 15 minutes in and things were getting suddenly turn into Seabiscuit. The perfect, pain-
worse. Of course that never stopped me free, problem-free race doesn’t exist. There is
before and, after all, I’m a new man. adversity and there always will be. Nobody ever
So, immune to the fact that I was said triathlon was easy. In fact, nobody ever said
attempting a 2 hour run barefoot on a life was easy.
slanted surface, and refusing to accept You see, I came to realize that adversity is a
the feeling that my leg was going to part of life. The big challenge in life and in sport is
break in half, I started running again not whether you’ll get through the adversity but,
without a second thought. rather, how you deal with the adversity when it
Then it happened. It was one of begins to get to you, what you learn from your
those knife-piercing, hurts-to-walk type experience and who you become because of it.
of injuries. It was the kind of debilitating pain Adversity is not a means of dragging you
that could make a grown man almost cry. In one down, but an opportunity to build you up. In
fateful step, I realized that all the strength I had all my decades of racing triathlon I suppose this
built up over the year, all the stamina and speed, might be one of the most important lessons I’ve
all of it, in 1 second, was destroyed. I almost learned: that the perfect race and the perfect
cried. I cussed and yelled. Still feeling somewhat season is completely imperfect. That life is not
cinematic, I gazed at the endless expanse of the about fearing adversity but of confronting it and
ocean and felt a wave of sadness envelope me. conquering it and becoming a better person
I had transformed from Leonardo DiCaprio in because of it. Adversity, in a funny way, is in
Titanic to the isolated loneliness of Tom Hanks in itself, perfection. It proves that I’m human and
Castaway. “WIIIIL-SOONNNNNN!!!!” I screamed not a celluloid figment of my imagination.
symbolically to nobody in particular. Somehow with this simple understanding,
I turned around and started hobbling back to my season improved dramatically. Sure I couldn’t
the car, each hobble more painful than the last. run on the road for a few months, but in the end
I was angry, frustrated, distraught, perturbed I emerged the winner. I had one of the best, most
and every other distressed adjective I could frustrating and most painful races of my career.
conjure up. That was the exact moment, as I was It was perfect.
hobbling in my embroiled pain, that the seagull
took a crap on my head. Jeff Matlow is a writer, triathlete, limper,
Of course. I had transmogrified into Steve cusser and owner of
imATHLETE.com. He’s
Martin from “The Jerk.” trying to be a better person but is not sure
I finally got back to the car with my leg feeling it’s working.
jeffruns@imATHLETE.com / @
worse, wiped the bird poop off my head and IAmAthlete on Twitter
called my friend Jon to vent. “Why do you keep
130 USA TriAThlon winter 10
USATTriwinter10pgs102-129.indd 130 12/9/09 4:43:07 PM
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