p74 postcards PASSED:p82 Postcards passed 17/02/2009 11:11 Page 74
POSTCARDS FROM THE EDGE
Can I take
your orders
please!
Paul
www.bgdf.co.uk
Stephenson
The last time you looked at sectors may have
Printwear
been in your old maths classroom, but as Paul
&
Stephenson explains, the canny salesperson ignores
Promotion
them to his or her peril in a tough marketplace.
‘D
ammit Nigel, we’re three per cent down there the requirement isn’t complex…’Can we have to be had selling
in aerospace, four per cent down in some red sweatshirts with our school crest on jazz mags in a monastery
catering, and if we don’t show please?’ Mmmmm that’s a toughie; the repeat (don’t answer that one)?
significant penetration into Soft Fruits by next orders are simple – when you’ve got the embroidery So what about the pros and cons of the
Wednesday, CJ’s going to bend me over the walnut disk ‘Spelling est Optionare’ made up, it’s a quick Corporate and Work Wear sectors? Shirts, blouses,
bureau and use me to sharpen his pencils.’ and easy re-run; and my house looks like the set skid resistant pants, anti arse over tit boots…. There
There’s diddly on telly, so whip up a frothy from Oliver – kids are all over the place, it’s a big are plenty of ups: in more and more industries it’s a
Horlicks, slice up the Battenberg, and let’s have a market. How many ‘ups’ do you want? Let’s requirement rather than an option so it’s a growing
look at sectors. Breaking it down into Schoolwear, change our name to Fagin’s School Outfitters, order market; some companies will have specialist
Corporate and Workwear, Charity and Fashion - some finger-less gloves and a shiny new clay pipe. technical needs, lint free jumpers and anti static
what are we in, what do we want to be in, and do I’ll be guided by my school wear counterparts on socks, so you can become expert in certain fields;
we give a monkey’s nut bag? this, but all that said I wonder if it’s just a bit too and presumably if your keywords are TIES TIES TIES
Well perhaps we should – as we prepare to bat easy…..what about the downs? Doesn’t it mean you should get a tie enquiry, so easy web site
on an increasingly sticky wicket, with the likelihood that everyone’s at it, especially a bloke called positioning – all you need to ice the bun is to
of ball tampering, presumably we should be George who works at somewhere called ASDA? Is develop a recession proof waistcoat, and you’re on
speaking a very specific message to very specific competition horrendous, and is there more margin your way to Lootville.
groups of people, in the hope that someone might The only down side I can think of is the
hear us and place an order, which would be nice. increased risk of speaking to corporate types who
Here are some ups and downs…… may at any time, ‘Park the Porsche, get their skill
First in the queue outside Stinker’s office, School ball stuck in the long grass, not wash their own
Wear: my youngest son, Rambo, is living proof that face, fall out of bed, go south, run a flag up the
there is a constant requirement for this stuff, and pole to see if it flies’ and generally talk out of their
not just because they keep growing out of it. He spotty public schoolboy bottoms.
demonstrated this recently, returning home from But if those recession proof waistcoats don’t
shooting his third film in the series, ‘Rambo, work and we’re all off down the Rock and Roll
Through a Hedge Backwards’. He assures me this is Office, we’re going to need the Charity Sector.
a significant improvement on ‘Rambo and the Mud I love those boys don’t you….‘To raise money
Men’ and ‘Rambo and the Pocket of Dog Dirt’, but for skanking dole dodgers with reclining leather
the end sequence is the same, featuring our hero sofas and 73 foot plasma screen TV’s, a team from
being hosed down on the drive prior to the bill for a Skanking Dole Dodger Relief are off on a
new uniform – the phrase ‘repeat orders’ comes to sponsored pot holing expedition. We will require
mind. the donation of rubber gloves, ropes, hard hats,
And this isn’t the only attraction: in spite of the chocolates, and two hundred T-shirts with a 19
current UK truancy levels and children’s inability to colour discharge print plus gold foil, gloss and
locate simple things like their hands and feet, I glitter. In return for supplying this buck shee, we
doubt that schools are hard to find - so at least you will of course allow you to print your own sponsors
can pin point your customer; and once you’re in Mischievous kids go through plenty of clothes, logo under the arm pit – your company branding is
offering more sales potential
| 74 | March 2009 www.printwearandpromotion.co.uk
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