it would not be a cold idea and I would have warmed the context (Burnham, 2005) enough for this type of discussion to happen, especially as it would have been started in the check-in and during the session. I’m aware this also relies on confi dence, for the family to be able to say and do this, alongside those in the family potentially taking a risk, which may be diffi cult due to power issues. I am fi nding that I am connecting much
more with families in between sessions than I do if I’m seeing them face-to face. Aſt er some sessions, I am taking a photo of the worksheet or other information and sending it to them and texting in between sessions much more frequently. I wonder if I’m trying to compensate for my availability only being ‘virtual’ in recognition of my lack of physicality from person to person, perhaps for both our needs. I want to state my appreciation to
the families who are navigating this new, uncertain and virtual way of communicating with me. T ank you to the functional family
therapy team in Brighton for their thoughtfulness, care and adaptability to support each other for the benefi t of the team and the families we see.
John and colleagues, Mylo and Ollie
chair and have the screen upright for fi ve minutes if she could see my dog aſt erwards. T is request was met happily; however, in relation to power and knowing I only have the screen as a tool to see them, and my options are limited anyway in relation to this new way of engaging. Being able to engage diff erently and matching to the family’s style virtually is what we do as systemic psychotherapists. Where there have been families with
high confl ict, I have intervened by commenting on the process of being virtual and wondered with them all if due to the ‘lag’ I had missed something, which has enabled the process to be slowed down. When thinking about working with
families virtually, I’m connecting to my ownership of my expertise of the functional family therapy framework, and continuing with curiosity regarding the families and the context of uncertainty in the world, and this new way of working virtually. Mason
40
framed this as “authoritative doubt”(Mason, 1993, 2019). I feel I have remained curious regarding families’ relationship to screens and video calling and I’ve been interested, and have felt more assertive over a screen. I have taught communication skills to families and initiated and facilitated a role-play with ease. I’m wondering if this assertiveness is related to my authoritative doubt and being over a screen is easier, if one removed, and missing the additional politeness of being in the family’s front room!
Checking out: ending the session I will end the virtual session like a face-
to-face session by reviewing the content and the process. However, with additional questions including: “How did you fi nd the process of doing the session virtually? Was there anything that I missed as I couldn’t see or hear?” I would hope, as I have weaved and highlighted this throughout, that
References Alexander, J.F., Waldron, H.B., Robbins, M.S. & Neeb, A.A (2013) Functional Family Therapy for Adolescent Behavior Problems. Washington: American Psychological Association. Boyd, E. (2010) ‘Voice entitlement’ narratives in supervision: Cultural and gendered infl uences on speaking and dilemmas in practice. In: C. Burck & G. Daniel (eds.) Mirrors and Refl ections: Processes of Systemic Supervision. London: Karnac. Burnham, J., Alvis Palma, D. & Whitehouse, L. (2008) Learning as a context for diff erences and diff erences as a context for learning. The Journal of Family Therapy, 30: 529-542. Burnham, J. (2005) Relational refl exivity: A tool for socially constructing therapeutic relationships. In: C. Flaskas, B. Mason & A. Perlesz (eds ) The Space Between: Experience, Context, and Process in the Therapeutic Relationship. London: Karnac. Mason, B. (1993) Towards positions of safe uncertainty. Human Systems, 4: 189-200. Mason, B. (2019) Re-visiting safe uncertainty: Six perspectives for clinical practice and the assessment of risk. Journal of Family Therapy, 41 343-356.
John Cavanagh is a systemic and family psychotherapist and mental health nurse. He is embedded in Brighton’s adolescent and children’s services. He also has a private practice for teaching, training, supervision and seeing families and couples. John is also a committee member of the Sussex branch of AFT. Email:
john@therapyinbrighton.com
Context 169, June 2020
From ‘joining’ to ‘social distancing’
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