OFFICER SUPPORT


her blood, which then led to her organs shutting down. “It was absolutely horrific, I didn’t know


what to do,” said Laura. “At that point I didn’t know how to carry on, let alone go to work.” Laura took four months of maternity leave before returning to work. She soon joined meetings held by Sands, the national stillbirth and neonatal death charity, which gave her a place to share her story and a chance to meet others who understood her emotions. “It wasn’t until I returned to work that I realised just how many people are impacted by child or baby loss,” continued Laura, who is open about the fact that she continued to struggle emotionally, especially following the


birth of her two sons Daniel and Joshua. In 2015, Laura was diagnosed with PTSD. Having received counselling to help her deal with her past trauma, Laura began to feel better than she had for as long as she could remember, and knew she wanted to create a support group for colleagues who may have been through a similar experience.


Although the network had been


informally supporting others for four years, the Child Loss Support Network was officially launched by Laura during Baby Loss Awareness Week in October 2022. “We held a memorial service, which dozens of people attended – an event that I want to make an annual date in our calendars. We read a list of children’s names people had sent to me, to remember and honour those we have


lost, and we unveiled a bench on-site, dedicated to those children who have died,” said Laura. Laura is also grateful to the Herts Police


Women’s Network, and the Men’s Forum. Forum. Both of these organisations have assisted her in offering knowledge and ideas on how to set up the network. “It’s really important to stress that


men are just as much a part of our baby loss support network as women. Men experience the same loss and suffer the pain too, but they are often forgotten about in these situations with the focus


difficult situations and if we’re struggling with our own loss or trauma, that can be even harder. I want to encourage line managers not to give up on their staff but instead, please stick with them - it might be that they just need that extra support and time. It’s important for all line managers to recognise that birthdays and anniversaries will be difficult each year. The best way forward is to keep communicating so that any care and support can be bespoke. “I am attending a policing conference in


“We held a memorial service, an event that I want to make an annual date in our calendars. We read a list of children’s names people had sent to me, to remember and honour those we have lost”


falling on the mother. Men often rush back to work and feel that they have to provide for their family while their partner recovers. This can lead to a build-up of emotions and ongoing mental health suffering, so it is really important that our male colleagues are given the time and opportunity to grieve too and that they are suitably supported.” Moving forward, Laura is hoping to hold additional events, as well as quarterly support meetings. She said: “We’re really only just getting up


and running but it’s a start. We’re definitely turning a corner - people are speaking more about baby and child loss, and it’s definitely not as taboo as it used to be. I want to support line managers too. Being in the police, our job is so unique, we can find ourselves dealing with some seriously


Manchester at the end of January, which focuses on perinatal mental health and policing life. This is an amazing opportunity for me to meet others from across the UK and the wider policing community, to spread the word of the good work and support that


Herts Police are offering to our colleagues, and to gain ideas and insight into what other forces are doing to support officers following baby loss. I am looking forward to bringing the information, tools and skills I will gain from this conference back with me to Herts to share with others and improve our offerings even further. I am also in the process of expanding the network into Bedfordshire Police, thanks to many supportive colleagues. I hope one day we can make this a national network for all those who need it.


“I’m doing all of this whilst also carrying out my day job of being a DS in CID, working all hours and being a busy mum of two boys. I feel passionate about this because I hope to turn my own awful experience of losing my daughter, into a positive by helping others.”


43 | POLICE | FEBRUARY 2023


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