INDULGENCES outrageous by jizzona straynger With summer quickly approaching an end, August finally saw some summer-like weather in the
O.C./L.A. regions. With that warm weather came a lot of beach time and fun-in-the-sun action for me. I think I may have fallen in love as well! I met one amazing man we’ll call “Burberry.” More on him next month. I started the month off hosting Sassy’s Drag Wars at Here Lounge in WeHo. It was so much fun and a true honor to get to work with some of Los Angeles’ finest in drag perform- ers including Tammie Brown, Landon Cider, Ida Slapedher and more! The only thing that really sucked about the whole thing was the drive back to O.C. I came rolling into my boudoir at 3:30 a.m. as my parents were boarding a plane in Oklahoma for a week visit to Southern California. As promised, I told you all last month there were sure to be some stories from the parental visit
and boy did they not disappoint. For those of you who missed last month’s column, my parents are in the dark about all my fabulousness. That’s right, Jizzona Straynger is in the closet. When they ar- rived, it was imperative that all of my things were discreetly packed away from common view. Talk about a big job! Hiding my six big wigs required a little assistance from a few friends’ trunks. The first sign of trouble occurred on Tuesday night when my mom fished out an eyelash from behind my washer and dryer. By the time the trip was over, she had managed to locate two complete sets of eyelashes and a dustpan of glitter and sparkle. Wednesday, after visiting the Trinity Broadcast- ing Network and appearing for a live taping of Praise the Lord, my mom discovered the beaten and battered Jizzy Doll, who had managed to slip behind my bookshelf. To my surprise, my mom actually knew that it was a “drag queen,” and couldn’t figure out why anyone would make such a doll and what purpose it was serving in my house; clearly, not a very good purpose behind my bookshelf. On Thursday, we did leave the drag accoutrements behind for a lovely sail over to Cata- lina for the afternoon. On Sunday we wrapped up the interesting visit with a little church service at Free Chapel in Irvine. Needless to say, the camp was fired up about the reversal of Prop. 8. After that uncomfortable experience, we spent the rest of the day relaxing on the beach in Laguna. All in all it was great for my family to be here, but the surprise of their life was waiting for them when they got back to Oklahoma. Someone managed to report to my family all about me, and while that may be fine and dandy, I’ve never been of fan of people outing others. Now with the cat out of the bag— and with my parents in
therapy...again—we move on. After the parental visit, my Orange County girls packed up our wig boxes and headed to Irvine
ADVENTURES JIZZONA STRAYNGER’S
for Orange County Pride. Not sure how the crowd was going to be, I didn’t know what to expect. Much to my surprise, the event was well-attended, minus the fact only beer and wine were served. That didn’t stop Team Jizzona from making a liquor store run to stock up on my favorite: vodka-diet coke. Once the real booze started flowing, things got a little crazy in the dressing room. My sister Mozie PornWood gave us all a show in nothing but her lady parts; I’ve got pictures for blackmail purposes. After my final performance, and stealing two plates of food from onlookers, my entou- rage and me headed to The White House in Anaheim for the O.C. Pride White Party —(thank you for the two who actually came in white)! I hosted a lovely fashion show filled with hot beefcakes in tight undies! There were some very pretty girls there, but seriously, the gays were all about the boys! Coming up this month I’ll be taking my eatin’ pants down to Long Beach the weekend of September 11 for the Annual Long Beach Lobster Festival. On Thursday, September 16 I’ll be packing my bags and heading to Provincetown, MA for a weekend of fun with the National Gay Pilot’s Association. I’ll be hosting a gay-gala on Saturday night followed by a stomp through one of the gayest cities in America! On September 24, I’ll be strappin’ my hair on tight for a magical time for OUT on the Mountain at Six Flags Magic Mountain. Finally, you can see me and the rest of my O.C. crew for Tossed Salad, a drag/dining experience, at the San Clemente Inn! As always, The Ho Must Go On! does go on Sundays at 7:00 p.m. at Hamburger Mary’s, Long
Beach with FREE PARKING and all new $1 Jizzy Jell-O shots! Also be sure to tune in live every Tues- day at 6:00 p.m. for
BabbleOnPodcast.com where we’re dishin’ the dirt and calling it like it is in L.A./ Orange counties!
Until next month, poodles, remember that you can’t tell the size of the turnips by lookin’ at their tops!
Kisses, poodles! ~Jizzona
jizzona.com + Twitter: @Jizzona + Facebook: /jizzona
Be sure to sign up for The Rage Monthly e-blast to stay connected with all that is going on in O.C./L.A. at
ragemonthly.com ! photography by Dennis Covey—
coveyeditions.com 68 RAGE monthly | SEPTEMBER 2010
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