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parent’s fantasies and expectations.


How can each family member connect with their true self? Parents need to understand that the path to creating a connected relation- ship with their children is to first create one with themselves. Realizing this, they consider their own inner growth a high priority. Children need to learn who they are


and what they really enjoy. Parents can help by allowing children to just sit by themselves. If inundated with activities and subjected to numerous lessons, how can young people hope to recog- nize their authentic voice amid the din of all this “doing”?


How do children benefit from conscious or awakened


parenting? Conscious parenting mandates that we place the task of connecting with our children front and center, especially before correcting them. Admonishing and punishing them becomes second- ary to the main imperative of conscious


connection. It’s crucial we realize we aren’t raising a “mini-me”, but a spirit throbbing with its own signature. Thus, it’s vital to separate in our mind who we are from who each child is. Children aren’t ours to possess or own in any way. When we know this in the depths of our soul, we tailor their raising to their needs, rather than molding them to fit our needs. Children raised in this way grow


up to be fearless and infinitely resilient, knowing that their purpose in life is to live in their most authentic and true way. Conflicts decrease and conscious, connected communication increases.


What can parents do when they fall back into old patterns, shaming children or doing other things that


create distance? When this happens, parents need to sit with themselves and look deeply within, asking: “What is it about me that feels the need to deride, scorn and shame my children?” In such introspection, they might discover


triggers from old wounds that have nothing to do with a child’s behavior. When they can see the internal link, they can begin to make the transfor- mations they need. As a parent, I have learned that my


role is to step aside, stay in infinite possibility, heal my own wounds, fill my own bucket and let my child fly.


How can closer, awakened families co-create a better


world via the ripple effect? When children grow up feeling con- nected with their parents and deeply seen by them, they march into the outer world feeling self-confident and aware of who they truly are, secure in their own inherent inner-connec- tivity. Children raised in this manner naturally help advocate for peace and harmony in all of their relationships; incidents of bullying, anxiety and discrediting one’s self and others decrease exponentially.


Judith Fertig is a freelance writer from Overland Park, KS (JudithFertig.com).


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