MovieReviews RATINGS GUIDE
BBBB Masterpiece BBB Very good BB Okay B Poor
No stars: Waste of time by Ann Hornaday It’s tough to guess who will enjoy “Secretari-
KIND OF A FUNNY STORY
Not so funny, this story. But we’re not sure what else it might be. 28
YOU WILL MEET A TALL DARK STRANGER
Woody Allen’s latest is, well, much like Woody Allen’s others of late. 28
NUREMBERG: ITS LESSON FOR TODAY
More than 60 years after it was made, the mesmerizing
documentary arrives in American theaters. 29
PLUS
Family Filmgoer 30 DVDs 35
OPENING NEXT WEEK
Red stars Bruce Willis, Morgan Freeman, John Malkovich and Helen Mirren as the CIA’s top agents. . . . Genius Within: The Inner Life of Glenn Gould is the story of the famous pianist. . . . Jackass 3-D. ... A wife is persuaded to have an affair so her husband can get out of jail in Stone. ... Nowhere Boy is a story of John Lennon. . . . Two lovers learn that celebrating their union is more about the journey than the wedding in White Wedding.
at” more — filmgoers who remember the ex- traordinary events of 1973, when the chestnut 3-year-old won the first Triple Crown in 25 years, or those for whom the story is brand- new. With this stirring, thoroughly entertain- ing movie, director Randall Wallace (who wrote “Braveheart”) has achieved the next to impossible, injecting genuine tension and sus- pense into a narrative we all know the ending to.
Wallace’s secret is that he makes “Secretari-
at” about characters, not races, and he has found irresistible protagonists in both his equine and human subjects. Coming from be- hind with a heart as big as a house is Secretari- at, known to his owners and intimates as Big Red, who at first is so slow “he couldn’t beat a fat man encased in cement being dragged back- wards by a freight train,” according to his train- er (played with quirky, crusty gusto by John Malkovich). But his owner believes in him: Penny Chenery Tweedy, a Denver homemaker who inherits her father’s Virginia horse farm and battles the sexist forces of her own family and the horse racing establishment to champi- on Big Red and change the face of the sport for- ever.
One of the best things “Secretariat” has go- ing for it is that Tweedy is played by Diane Lane, who brings her signature, ineffable blend of radiance, toughness and demure reserve to a woman who knows how to wear just the bright brooch when upending the patriarchy. It’s a testament to Big Red’s mythical force that he’s
secretariat continued on 30 SECRETARIAT Get a great story and run with it
27
JOHN BRAMLEY/DISNEY ENTERPRISES There’s no quit in either one of them: Diane Lane is just right as Secretariat’s owner.
LIFE AS WE KNOW IT
They’re in an awful mess
by Michael O’Sullivan
“Life as We Know It” calls to mind the punch line of an old joke. Seems the Lone Ranger and Tonto are sur- rounded by angry Indians on the warpath. “It looks like we’re in real trouble now, Tonto,” says the Lone Ranger. To which Tonto replies, “What do you mean ‘we,’ paleface?” After watching this silly, cliche-ridden — and
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yet more than slightly alien — romantic com- edy, you might feel a similar urge to disavow membership in the club suggested by its all- embracing title. Whose life are we talking about, exactly?
Although the words are meant to suggest the PETER IOVINO
The cliches come fast and furious in “Life as We Know It,” starring Katherine Heigl and Josh Duhamel as guardians of a baby.
universality of the human condition — We’re all in this mess together, huh, pal? — there’s really only one tiny group of people on the planet for whom the “life” as depicted in “Life As We Know It” will feel the least bit recogniz- able: Hollywood movie producers.
I can almost hear the pitch meeting now:
There’s this married couple with a baby, see? And then one day the couple dies in a tragic car accident, leaving their adorably orphaned, 1- year-old daughter in the care of her hot single godparents. Except the godparents — I’m think- ing Josh Duhamel and Katherine Heigl here — never even knew about, let alone agreed to, this arrangement in the first place. The beauty part? They hate each other’s guts! Sounds like your life, right? Actually, it
doesn’t sound any less plausible than the sit- com proposed by George on “Seinfeld” way back when, in which a judge sentences an unin- sured motorist to be George’s butler — his but- ler, for God’s sake — after a traffic accident. Hey, it could happen. Conveniently enough, there are no blood
relatives who can take in the kid, other than one cousin who’s a stripper, another who al- ready has nine children and a grandfather on an oxygen tank. That leaves Holly Berenson (Heigl) and Eric Messer (Duhamel) — or “Mess,” as he is aptly known — to move in to-
life continued on 30
THE WASHINGTON POST • FRIDAY, OCTOBER 8, 2010
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