dads
Worry, worry, worry
As a dad to be, you may not have the same level of hormonal disruption during your partner’s pregnancy, but you’re certainly not immune to the rollercoaster of emotions… New dad, Fergal McCallum, can totally
D
uring a pregnancy – and particularly a first pregnancy – much of the attention tends to be focussed on the mum to be.
But while she may become caught up with
all of the positive and negative symptoms of this unique condition, the dad to be’s life - for the most part – tends to carry on pretty much as normal. According to a recent survey by Natural
Baby Shower, however, during pregnancy, expectant dads can have just as many worries and anxieties as their partners! Te study of 1000 dads showed that dads’
concerns cover every aspect of the pregnancy, the labour and the future. One third of the dads questioned said
that their biggest worry was whether the delivery would go smoothly, with many
46MODERNMUM
expressing concerns about the wellbeing of both their partner and new baby, such as the reality of having to see their partner in pain and feeling helpless to do anything about it. In 2008, leading obstetrician, Michel
Odent – who, at that time, had overseen 15,000 births - caused controversy when he said that men should never be allowed to be present when their wife or partner gave birth. ‘Generally speaking,’ Odent said at the
time, ‘I have noticed that the more the man has participated at the birth and the worse his wife’s labour has been, the higher the risks of post-natal ‘symptoms’ are. Of course, this is not the case for all men, but it seems without doubt that some men are at risk of being unwell or depressed due to having seen their partners labour.’
empathise with Odent’s views. ‘From the moment that my wife told me
she was pregnant, I knew that I didn’t really want to be in the delivery suite - not because I didn’t want to see my child come into the world, but because I have a very low pain threshold. I also hate the sight of blood, so the thought of the whole experience was really freaking me out. I tried to prepare myself, but I have to say that, aſter watching my wife in pain for almost 17 hours, I was really distressed – to the extent that I don’t honestly know if I even want us to have another child and make her go through that again. Watching the person you love be in that much pain was awful.’ So, how can dads to be address this particular fear?
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