new arrival
“Make your child feel closer to the baby by telling them that the
baby is getting to know them by listening to their voice.”
appointments and explain the process to them? Children of around three years of age should be able to go to your doctor’s appointments, while older children – particularly those in pre-school or school, could be included on special visits such as when you’re having your first scan. While there, they can hear the baby’s heartbeat and see the little shape on the screen. Tis type of experience will bring the reality of this new life right home to your child and will again help with the bonding process. Explain that this is the way that they came into the world too, as this will make them feel really special.
Spend time with a newborn If you’ve any friends or family, who have just had a baby, then take your child visiting, as this will not only remove any preconceptions or concerns about being around such a small baby, but will also let your child see how a baby sounds, what it looks like and how it is held and, if necessary, comforted. Your child may, for example, have very high expectations of having an instant playmate, so spending time with a newborn will teach them that, for a while, baby will be very small and not able to do much. Also show your child pictures of when they were a young baby and tell them about all the things that you did for them. Explain about why babies cry and about how they like to be talked to. Explain how babies can’t do anything for themselves for a long time and about how
much care has to be taken of them because they’re so precious – ‘just like you’!
Encourage them to ‘spend time’
with the baby Make your child feel closer to the baby by telling them that the baby is getting to know them by listening to their voice. (Babies can hear in the womb from around 23 weeks of age, so it’s a good idea at this time for your child to start talking to the baby so that they will get to know them.) Aſter about three months, your child’s voice will be familiar to the baby. Choose a regular time each day when you’re relaxing with your toddler and encourage them to speak – or sing – close to your tummy. Let them rest their head on your bump as this will make them feel close to the baby. It’s a great way to start the process of bonding between the two! Once your baby begins to move or to kick, you can lie down and invite your child to put their hands on your tummy to feel the movement.
Know your limits… At some point your child will realise that they have to share you with a new arrival and this period can be tricky. If you put the building blocks in place throughout your pregnancy, however, you’ll have done as much as you can to smooth the transition from ‘the one and only’ to the ‘older sibling’. Getting them used to having a baby brother or sister before they arrive is great for bonding – as, of course, is a little ‘giſt from the baby’ when he or she arrives! „
Prepare them for the reality Ask them what they think it will be like to have a baby in the house. Encourage them to ask questions and don’t be surprised by the range of questions that are on their little minds. Tere are a lot of good books on the market which are specially designed to introduce a small child to the concept of a new arrival. Involve them in getting the nursery
ready and in shopping for baby items. Te more they feel involved, the more welcoming they’ll be to the new arrival. Encourage them to choose certain items so that they feel that they have real input into the preparations. If your child is old enough, why not take them along to some of your antenatal
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