How were you first approached about making your video journal into a documentary movie? About a month after I posted my YouTube video,


which went viral, I was approached by writer/director Linda Bloodworth-Thomason. She convinced me that my story needed to be told and that she wanted to be the one to turn it into a feature length docu- mentary. We both agreed that personal stories are the most effective way of opening hearts and minds. She wanted people to come face to face with who and what they are opposing, which essentially is love. What was the experience of makingBridegroom like for you personally? Working on the documentary was hard at times.


I was forced to revisit the darkest period of my life and, although it definitely opened up some wounds, overall it was a very cathartic and healing experience for me. I’m grateful to Linda for encouraging me to take an ac- tive role in making the film. I’m so proud of it and am beyond thankful that I will have a permanent, tangible testament to Tom and the love we shared. Did you expect the movie to become so well- received, even winning honors from critics groups and GLAAD? Linda and I definitely did not anticipate as


much success as we have had. With a limited budget we set out to make a simple, relat- able, moving film that focused on the love story and not the politics. We were beyond thrilled and honored to have Bridegroom premiere at the Tribeca Film Festival, where we won the Audience Award for best docu- mentary. Bridegroom won the Audience Award at nearly every festival at which it screened and was named Best Documen- tary at the 2013 Gay and Lesbian Entertainment Critics’ Dorian Awards. We are also very humbled by our recent GLAAD nomination. Accolades aside, Bridegroom has achieved the greatest accomplish- ment of all: opening people’s hearts and minds and inspiring others to fight for equal rights. Have you gotten any negative feedback from viewers or from Tom’s family? Marriage equality and LGBT rights are such polar-


izing social issues, so we knew that the film would not impress or receive great reviews from everyone. We got many hateful messages and comments from people, but that feedback was minimal compared


to all of the positive and warm responses. People have said that the film gave them hope and literally stopped them from taking their own life. As cliché as it sounds, the fact that we were able to reach even one person is rewarding and makes it easy to ignore the opposition. We wanted Tom’s family to participate in the docu-


mentary but his parents never responded. Dozen of Tom’s relatives have seen the film though and have told me that they are proud of it and support me, for which I’m tremendously grateful. I understand you have been traveling quite a bit, showing and discussing the film with students and other audiences. How has that experience been?


that I am still so young and the probability of falling in love again is likely. If it’s meant to happen, it will. I hope I will love again, but right now I’m focused on sharing my story, spreading awareness and learning to love myself. Will Bridegroom be available on DVD or online streaming? You’ve also mentioned it may be adapted into a stage play. Bridegroom premiered on the Oprah Winfrey


Network (OWN) last October and since then has become available on Netflix, iTunes, and at Redbox kiosks. A lot of people have encouraged me to write a book and I have been approached by a handful of people who believe that the story should be adapted into a play. I can’t say for sure where or how the story of Bridegroom will end but I plan on doing whatever it takes to continue opening people’s hearts and minds. Part of that includes exploring alternative avenues and mediums that could potentially reach more people. With your newfound fame, do you see yourself pursuing a future in show business or do you have other career plans? I definitely don’t consider myself famous,


but I am aware that I have an invaluable opportunity and an unexpected platform to reach a lot of people. I have no intention of pursuing a career in show business but I am open to producing more documentaries about issues that inspire. I also hope I can continue traveling and speaking to young people. Any advice for readers who may have suffered a similar loss or experience as you have since Tom’s death and his family’s reaction to you? Losing my partner Tom showed me that life is fragile and you never know when it


I recently started a college screening tour, which


has truly been an amazing experience. I’m so inspired by these organizations and students; they are work- ing hard to promote equal rights and celebrate diversity on their respective campuses. It gives me great hope that future generations will live in a world filled with more love and tolerance. More personally, have you had a romantic relationship with anyone since Tom’s passing? Do you envision yourself in one in the future? For a long period of time following Tom’s passing,


the thought of falling in love again made me sick. As I’ve healed over the years though, I’ve come to realize


might be your last day. We owe it to all of the friends, family members and those who are no longer with us to live our lives proudly and shamelessly. I’ve spent most of my life living in fear and holding myself back from truly being free. Don’t do what I did; don’t give power to your unfortunate circumstances or to people who try to minimize or degrade you. Stand up for what you believe in, be proud of who you are and do what makes you happy, because tomorrow isn’t promised. For information about the film, go to bridegroommovie.com. For tickets and more information about the GLAAD Media Awards go toglaad.org


“…life is fragile and you never know when it might be yourlast day. We owe it to all of the friends, family members and those who are no longer with us to live our livesproudly and shamelessly.”


APRIL 2014 APRIL 2014 | | RAGE monthly monthly 41


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